Hi Ryan. I am very intrigued by your mindset because I find it is the masculine version of my own. Although I have been “analyzing” myself for some time now and especially myself in relationships, i have never been able to successfully articulate not only what I want but who I am because of the way I think, as beautifully as you were able to in your reply. I do enjoy performance based love as well. Although I have been told constantly I am beautiful enough to not need much depth or skill. I feel there is a world full of beautiful people. Feeling like I give my best at everything I do (and I have VERY high standards) is important to my sense of self worth.
12. Look beyond his good looks. Don't be dazzled by a handsome face and buff bod. Is this guy worthy of winning your heart? "How good is he at relationships? How does he treat his mother? How does he get along with siblings, cousins and friends?" asks Brooks. If the answer to those questions is not too well, take heed. Once he is confident of your affections, he might revert to type and treat you like everyone else he "cares" about.
This reminds me of my husband. Early in our relationship. We got a puppy and the puppy got out of the apt as we were doing laundry in a separate laundry room. We searched and searched but could notfind him. My man lost it. He sobbed and was positively unconsollable. I got scared. He kept saying. He's scared and alone and so small. Ok I was sad but I'm not proud of it. I was scared and never saw how upset he was. I took offense. I thought wow you love this puppy more than me. Since he had never showed emo that strong with me.
I moved to LA after two years in New York, where there are a plethora of guys my age. Unfortunately, though I did go on dates, nothing stuck. Now, I’ve moved across the country. There could be a guy, even a friend of a friend (the perfect set-up!), currently living in New York who would be happy to be my boyfriend, but I’ll never know. Frequently, on the street in New York, I’d walk by a guy I could picture myself dating, and I’d want to blurt out, “What bar will you be at on Saturday, and why weren’t you also at The Jane last Saturday night like I was?!” Which brings me to:
This implies that if they went through a hard time financially, she’d be able to leave him with no guilt or remorse, but even if her beauty faded significantly after a given age, or any particular trait of hers that he loved her for decreased, he’d have no legitimate reason to leave, since those things could be considered “superficial” reasons to love someone, and that would work both ways.

Practice the Golden Rule. If you want him to do something, you should be equally willing to do it yourself. You want him to ask you out or take you out or do whatever else for you? You should be equally willing, and don't wait for or expect him to do it first. Good men respect a person who applies the same rules to themself that they would apply to a man.
Like when I'm in my regular clothes like he stares at me alot and and I kind of think he likes me but when I'm in my school uniform he doesn't pay any attention to me and he doesn't bother to talk to me or get to know me but then when I asked him out he was like I don't know yet but I feel like if you really did like me he would come and talk to me to know me so we can get to know each other he talks more to the other girls and he talks to me it's like having to get to know each other if we can talk and then I'm going as soon as I'm starting the conversation and it's like he doesn't real want to talk to me in the longest conversation we've ever had is it was about like five minutes and then it just got really crazy and his first girlfriend knew that I liked it and then I tried to be friends with his girlfriend to get closer to him but that didn't seem to work but I don't want to really be a man stealer I want him to want me and I don't want to be his third where I want to be his number one so now I'm like crossed up and I don't even know what to do anymore I just stop talking to him in trying to get closer to him and he just left me alone and I left him alone and it was like that's that but I still really like him then I don't know what to do.

How To Get A Man To Love You


As a teenagers the only representative we see about female sexual desire is girls felt pressure into sex by their boy friend and older people say she shouldn't do it, if she don't want it. Or the only way you can get a girl to have sex with you, is to toy with their emotion, telling them you want a committment, so she sleep with you and then dump her after the sex. All of these image portray an idea that women don't like sex and would only have sex to please their partner. Growing up bombarded with this sort of image, it make guys fear making a move on a girl even more. it is only after you reach adulthood and start interacting with more girls, you start realizing girls might have sexual desires too. And it is only in recent years, we start seen images on TV, with girls checking out guy with six pack, suggesting girls might actually enjoy sex, also.


So first of all, dating is a game. You have to play a few games in order to survive the dating world. This means you can’t always do what your emotions are telling you to do. If you’re really into a guy and you feel the need to text him  every hour – it’s probably best to hold off otherwise you might come across as clingy. Whenever you don’t act like yourself or in the way that you want to, that is technically “playing a game”.
This goes hand in hand with flirting, but I think it deserves a separate section of its own. Compliments are the easiest way to flirt with someone AND help them feel good about themselves. And remember- especially when it comes to males- the compliments don’t need to be three pages long. Something simple like “Wow you look good in red” or simply “Hey there handsome” is enough to put a smile on his face and give him that ego boost every man needs.
Can someone pls help me,I think I’m in a relationship right now I like this guy and I’m starting to have feelings for him,he likes me also its too obvious and he also starting to say that his feelings for me is going stronger but he never said to me that he loves me I want him to say that to me without asking him if he loves me..I don’t know how to make him says that to me

Messages To Send To A Guy You Like


Unfortunately, depression in men often gets overlooked as many of us find it difficult to talk about our feelings. Instead, we tend to focus on the physical symptoms that often accompany male depression, such as back pain, headaches, difficulty sleeping, or sexual problems. This can result in the underlying depression going untreated, which can have serious consequences. Men suffering from depression are four times more likely to commit suicide than women, so it’s vital for any man to seek help with depression before feelings of despair become feelings of suicide. Talk honestly with a friend, loved one, or doctor about what’s going on in your mind as well as your body. Once correctly diagnosed, there is plenty you can do to successfully treat and manage male depression and prevent it from coming back.
OK so my thing is a long distance thing and we are not together although he did spit a petty good game. We know eachother through mutual friends and just started talking I wasn’t interested at first so when we went 2 weeks with out talking it didn’t bother me… But recently we expressed our feelings for eachother. He was going to come and visit me in the next couple weeks and on new years eve I was a little excessive in texting him with no response… We talked on new years day and everythinight seemed fine… We had some interaction on social media the following days but he hasn’t responded to any of my texts… He hasn’t called me like did I scare him off??? He works in the oil field so he works 144 hours in 12 days… He has been on nights this past work so he Is sleeping during the day and I know he is probably exhausted… Did I scare him off I like him a lot and he liked me a lot I thought… I mean he opened up to me and we had so really deep talks… He even talked about moving here… But then we haven’t talked in 7 days of the phone and we haven’t had any contact on social media in like 5 days… I commented on a photo and said he should make it his profile picture and he did… But I’m just so lost and confused why is he ignoring me??? What happened I’m a very passionate person did I scare him off I hope I didn’t lose him my brain is going 100 miles an hour… HELP ME PLEASE!!!
Now when it comes to "getting" your man, there is one thing you must not do if you want a man to see a future with you. Do not treat him like some kind of project that needs to be fixed because it immediately brings up the walls. If you have the urge to try to change his clothes, his circle of friends, the way he talks, what he loves to do — don't do it!
Don’t text “Wanna do something this weekend?” Instead, say “Hey, I’d love to take you out for dinner Wednesday night.” If you can make a callback reference to a previous interaction—like a restaurant or type of food you both talked about—it’s even better. Say something like “Hey, how about dinner at that restaurant we talked about on Wednesday night? Around 8-ish?” As Chelsea Clishem at Patti Knows advises, texting should be the prelude to a conversation, not the conversation itself.

How To Attract Females


#11. Learn to take a joke…even if its personal                                #12. Learn to take criticism – Men criticize to see improvement, and they do it in order to try to help you see things in a different light.They also criticize to try and show you a solution or a better way to do something, if they see you are struggling. This is why you should learn how to take criticism, because if you freak out every time he criticizes you, you tell him that you won’t be able to improve in the future.
@ryan….thanks for sharing…gave a huge insight on how an ideal man would think. Its a standard the man has set for himself. and i think it gives security to the woman knowing that her man believes in himself enough to achieve. Most men give up when things get tough. I love how men want to ‘light up the world’ of the woman they are with…..its the greatest gift you guys can give to us. And if some abuse it – it doesnt make it any less valueable.
Stop going to those stupid parties. Expand your personal zeitgeist. "Nice guys" are putting on guerrilla art shows, working with the NRDC, riding in mountain bike rallies, and campaigning to get morons tossed out of Congress. Why not join one of these groups and make a little difference in the world? The men you meet will sometimes be startlingly hot, but who cares? You'll have time to get to know 10 or 12 of the buggers and decide which one really does deserve you.

Author Bio: Sam started Financial Samurai in 2009 to help people achieve financial freedom sooner, rather than later. He spent 13 years working in investment banking, earned his MBA from UC Berkeley, and retired at age 34 in San Francisco. Everything Sam writes is based on first-hand experience because money is too important to be left up to pontification.
Meet new guys. Before you get a boyfriend, you’ll have to meet some guys. Don't worry, it isn't as scary as you think. You can try to get into a relationship with a guy you already know if they are decent, or you can go out and meet some new guys. Make sure he's got a great personality, smart and things that you would like to look for in a guy. This is easy and fun to do, so don’t be nervous! Make sure when you're meeting new guys you don't come across fake.
Stock up on everything red, because recent studies have found that men describe women wearing red as sexier than women wearing any other color. Men are more attracted to and more willing to date a woman in red, while women wearing other colors have to try a bit harder to get their attention. So ditch that all-black outfit if you really want to pique your guy's interest.
The main reason that I don’t go after openly rich guys is because I believe that men who use their money in a flashy way are womanizers that attract their female-equivalents of whores and gold-diggers. I’m sorry for this negative stereotype of the dynamics of men/women, and I realize not all flashy men are bad, just like not every hooker or gold-digger is a bad person either, but I believe these extreme traits usually come from the less desirable characteristics of the opposite sex.

How To Get A Guy To Text You


Anyways, good advice for single women. I think there comes a point in most of our lives where a successful man becomes more attractive to us than a pretty man. Maybe this happens at about 25. I’m attending the wedding this weekend of a friend who is marrying a very successful guy and he is totally smitten by her – she is gorgeous, a fantastic surfer (better than him), a great cook and has a good legal career of her own.

Things Guys Like To Hear In Text Messages


So there you have it, 5 secrets for texting a guy you like. And to serve you in your love life, if you want to go deeper in this, we have written a texting guide for you. It is a fantastic e-book and it’s free! It’s a gift from me to you, I’ve posted a link right here in the description. You can go and click that link. Get that free texting guide. It will really serve you in your love life.
When I justify an action by me being busy, it usually means, sorry dude I consider that the things that I am doing at work right to be of a higher priority and interest than you are. This was me being brutally honest. Now it doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t care for that person intimately on a superficial level…it just means that since they are not a long term investment for me or possibly because I am not at that stage of commitment…
This guy added me on Facebook about a year ago and then messaged me on my birthday to ask me out for coffee.. At the time I was dating someone else and had to decline based on that and told him I appreciated the invite. A few months ago that boyfriend and I parted ways and a couple weeks ago I messaged that guy on Facebook and we started chatting for hours at a time online and eventually via text and seemed to really hit it off.. This last week we hung out several times and had a lot of fun. It seems he is into me by the way he talks and acts around me and I’ve made it clear I’m into him. However, since we hung out he hasn’t been the one to text me first and has been really inconsistent at times with when he eventually got around to texting me back. Either he takes up to 24 hours to reply or sometimes doesn’t reply at all. When we hung out he stated he had a lot on his mind right now and has been a bit stressed out with work. He works out of town on a 7 on 7 off schedule and seems to obviously have a lot of catching up to do with family/friends/life in general when he is home, so again I can understand the busy aspect of things.. I’m not a needy person, but I do text him maybe once a day just to say hello and to say that I hope he’s having a good day or that he was on my mind.. I feel like I’m getting some mixed messages now about whether or not he wants to be talking or even moving forward with hanging out. I’ve noticed at times that he has been active on social media after not responding to my texts right away.. I am somewhat inclined to straight up ask him if he still shares my interest in hanging out more and if he sees me as a possible girlfriend, but again it comes down to appearing needy or coming across too strong too early in the game. Is it better to be forward and ask straight up? Or should I just ride it out, stop messaging him for a while and see what happens? Could this just be an indication of his texting habits and maybe I’m reading into it too much?
When you follow this as outlined, it all adds up to something magical. When you embody a love of his Masculinity with your Appreciation for who he is, add in some Gratitude, a Nurturing spirit, an Easy-going nature, an ability to be Trustworthy, and honor his Independence all while captivating him — it all adds up to one thing. The final S is for Soulmate because that's what you'll have found.
Few calls a day when we not together and I never know when we meet….weekends he will be with me..sometimes even that I will not have….Talking about moving in together…but I’m thinking…do I really want to end up in huge house alone?? he is never home….I met him,I thought he working in zoo…I liked that idea…then I realized that little zoo…is not job.It’s his hobby…But was to late.I was in love.
Show him what makes you special. Letting a guy see what makes you such a catch is another great way to increase his affection for you. It will intrigue him and make him want to get to know you even better. For example, if you are skilled at playing an instrument, look for an opportunity to play in front of him. Or, if you are an excellent baker, whip up some cookies and share some with him.[8]
And as for what you asked if i would like to be loved based on my performance……..nooooooooooooooooooooooooowaaaayyyyyyyy!! haha i would be like so unlovable on that level. I don’t know how you guys do it…..but working is so stressful. I always get emotional and when things don’t go the way i wanted to or expected to i *need* someone to go to for a hug or comfort!
Love is the key to a good life, with riches or without true love from the heart creates riches because two to three minds are better than one. Death and loneliness comes to all but true Love covers all. Love makes lasting and real friendships which are not based on things but people and keeps the friends or family. Things including riches are to be shared with family, children who have no one in this world to take them to school, to provide food and clothing, teach them how to be rich and help others too, elderly and lonely too. when rich and poor die. they can take no riches or poverty with them. A rich heart makes riches becomes happy when sharing, knowledge, ideas, money and many more. I am rich in sharing all I can with those who do not have.
I suppose this is why I feel ambivalent about the subject. I’ve been on both sides of the story. Who I am today is someone who is motivated to BE someone on my own–I’m the breadwinner, I need to prove to myself I can do this. But I suppose for the women who really want to lock down a rich dude, I can advise. It would be fun to talk about it like that. I never really have before.
When you're depressed, just getting out of bed can seem like a daunting task, let alone working out! But exercise is a powerful depression fighter-and one of the most important tools in your recovery arsenal. Research shows that regular exercise can be as effective as medication for relieving depression symptoms. It also helps prevent relapse once you’re well.

Some of you are sounding like a bunch of gold digging bitches, if I was a rich man I would run for the hills. All I have to say is just be honest about your intention, you never know he might agree to an allowance to keep you around IF HE/SHE with the resources choose. Remember they will have the upper hand. BULLSHIT WALKS and MONEY TALKS, so if you ain’t got your own and you get used, just remember its not nice to use people, and the tables can turn they can use you too. How about findinging someone you respect and if they happen to be rich great. Money is only good for material things that you will have nice things, but you don’t have to have a nice man, he could be a major asshole because he didn’t get rich being a choir boy even though he might choose to be good to you. MONEY is not everything its a lot it don’t cover. Date RICH men at your own risk, women are throwing sex at them, so deal with that too, I just hopes he respects you and is faithful in this world of AIDS and Herpes. How about getting your SHIT, nothing is sexier than a woman who has her own and holds her own. NEVER play hard to get like you don’t want him, he will see through it. Be your natural self RICH men didn’t get rich being stupid they KNOW A PHONY just like you do a mile away. Good lucK but don’t count on it.

In fact, it may even prevent you from finding a boyfriend. You’ve heard the saying like attracts like? If you spend all your energy complaining about being single, you’re creating negative energy.  It’s like filling your body up with junk food. These junk thoughts impact what you attract. If you complain about being single, you’ll stay single. Or you’ll attract the wrong kind of guy simply because you don’t want to be alone.

The explanations of male thinking is also not "boys will be boys" trash that insists sexist and misogynistic behaviors are simply "biological" for men & have to be tolerated by women. Instead of making excuses, the author manages to be honest & fair in describing common male mindsets & how & why certain negative attitudes/behaviors are triggered (much as stereotypical female negative behaviors can be triggered by crappy moves on a guys' part). Since a relationship is a dynamic, it's only fair to adjust what you can control - yourself. So you learn very subtle methods to hone your social & dating skill to basically COMMUNICATE in a way that men in general will grasp correctly.


Now this boy being fresh out of high school too had no money! His parents, were the same financial situation as my own. So what was the difference between this boy and all others? He was a wonderful friend! But I also noticed, he climbed in the company quickly! He was smart, efficient, intelligent, and became the favorite of his bosses quickly. He had wonderful work ethic while at work, but was always late, not just by 5 min but sometimes an hour late to work EVERY DAY!! He got away with it because, he was so good at everything he did at work. he had a Midas touch. I latched onto him, not only because he was my best friend, but also, he was like following an ambulance with the lights on and blaring clearing the road for any one behind the ambulance.

While making plans, be as direct as possible. During their focus groups, Ansari and Dr. Klinenberg also noticed a texting trend they dubbed the “secretary problem,” where potential couples would spend so much time trying to “pencil each other in” they would burn out and the spark would fizzle before the first meetup. We asked Vanessa Marin, licensed marriage and family therapist and Lifehacker contributor, how to avoid the “secretary problem,” and she said it’s all about being specific:

Pinning down this date is a huge accomplishment. I have plenty of attractive friends who have bonded with a cute guy at a party and then never seen him again. Mutual sexual attraction is not enough; emotional compatibility is also critical. As I gulp down my drink that I will act like I’m going to pay for at the end of the date by “reaching for my wallet,” I pray that he realized my latest comment was sarcastic, that I didn’t sound like a complete idiot when he brought up politics, and that I’m exuding the confidence of Beyoncé. Also, that noise was just the sound of my chair moving against the ground, not a fart! Ugh, dates are hard. So hard that I don’t know if either of us will want to do this with each other again. Which brings me to:
Just read a book about psychology – manipulation – priming & Co for getting to know how to catch someones attention. To make him depending on your attention and love. Do not tell too much about you and be mysterious. Care about your look, but do not annoy him with long talks about styling, beauty OPs & Co. No man is interested in such bullsh*t and therefore you got your friends.
Its not the end of the world. Ive seen amazing reconstruction surgeries that are beautiful-working from nothing, and turning out to look better than most womens natural breasts. My advice to you is to remember that your a survivor! And that life goes on. You can and will, do and be, complete and better…im not just saying that. Its a reality if u want it. let go of any heartache and take what you deserve for your life, be happy. Congrats to you! Your so strong!

Texts To Keep A Guy Interested


In all honesty, there's nothing this book can do that can make me love it, add it to my fave list, or plainly stop the rage that grew inside me while reading this. Admittedly, this book just isn't for me. It's got stereotyping, an annoying protagonist that's in desperate need of popularity, a protagonist who tries to please every people she meets and is highly insecure of her standing in the popularity list.

Get A Guy To Love You


I'm in a bind with my partner who will react with verbal abuse after being triggered by Ne saying something that may have triggered A sense of shame, embarrassment or what ever feeling he felt. My words aren't intentionally hurtful and it rarely happens but when it does I reflect back on what i said and I could see why he over reacted. I apologise but the verbal abuse continues and then he leaves to sleep elsewhere. His behaviour isn't acceptable to a healthy and nurturing relationship and I really do try hard to not trigger him with what i say but surely I deserve the right to say what's on my mind in my own home without fearing abuse? What can I do to support him so he feels safe to express his true feelings instead of rage?

10. Treat his friends the way you treat your friends: smile politely, laugh at their jokes, and let your hatred for them slowly consume you from the inside out, like cancer. If you win over his former fraternity brothers, you’ll win his heart. And once you have his heart, you can keep it locked in the trunk of your car. So make plenty of snacks and, when in doubt, just pretend you’re a lamp.

How To Make Him Like Me More


Consider all the possible outcomes of dating your flatmate. If your dating relationship doesn’t work out, do you think you both could still continue being flatmates? Would living together be too much of a strain on a new dating relationship? If the age difference has you worried, consider how much age will truly impact your dating. Also consider how compatible you are together, your temperament, values, interests, and priorities. If these all seem to be a close match, then age shouldn’t matter so much.

What To Text A Man You Like


LOL, whatever. Most men I know are lazy as hell while their wives coordinate nearly every part of their lives. That includes my husband who acts like he’s doing me a big favor if he puts a load of his own clothes in the washer. AS IF washing his own clothing should be considered some sort of gift to me. He’s lucky that he’s intelligent, caring, and adorable.

Sigh. It’s not. You don’t have to spend any money to get a boyfriend – you can weave yourself a new hairband if you like. It’s just a way of subtly altering how you feel about yourself. You might find that an easy way to boost your confidence is to accentuate your favourite physical traits, perhaps in a new, slightly daring way, but one that’s true to your own style. But if you get the same kick from spending time with an affirming friend, or going travelling – then do it. Go with your gut and let it lead you to self-satisfied sexiness. This is how to get a boyfriend 101: simple stuff, but it actually works.

3. Email him links about his favorite TV show, which is the second season of “True Detective.” He loves that shows because it’s gritty and it’s what adults watch and he’s a fucking-a adult. Don’t just send him some random thinkpiece from a lame website like Vulture or Salon or The New York Times. Send him good links to smart blog posts that he can read on his chill Galaxy Note. If you loved him, you could go on a date with someone who works at HBO and ask him if Vince Vaughn really is that talented. That’s a really good question.
Realize differences in communication. Men can often miss the subtle messages that people send in their body language. Don't judge a guy because of this; it's just the way men are. Subtle body language like smiles only make a man think that you might like him; he can't assume it means you're interested without being accused of being a self-absorbed jerk. To drive the point home, gradually introduce more "obvious" body language like playful touches on the arm, playful banter and teasing, winks, inside jokes, playfulness, or (when you know him better) attempts to find a man's ticklish spots. (Don't be afraid to kindly tease him over minor things - people who pretend a man is perfect are regarded as weak in their eyes.) Flirting will not only show him you like him enough to get that physical and playful, but also help to break the physical barrier and allow a man to feel more comfortable making a few advances to you. But don't forget to look at how he is reacting to you.
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