This guy added me on Facebook about a year ago and then messaged me on my birthday to ask me out for coffee.. At the time I was dating someone else and had to decline based on that and told him I appreciated the invite. A few months ago that boyfriend and I parted ways and a couple weeks ago I messaged that guy on Facebook and we started chatting for hours at a time online and eventually via text and seemed to really hit it off.. This last week we hung out several times and had a lot of fun. It seems he is into me by the way he talks and acts around me and I’ve made it clear I’m into him. However, since we hung out he hasn’t been the one to text me first and has been really inconsistent at times with when he eventually got around to texting me back. Either he takes up to 24 hours to reply or sometimes doesn’t reply at all. When we hung out he stated he had a lot on his mind right now and has been a bit stressed out with work. He works out of town on a 7 on 7 off schedule and seems to obviously have a lot of catching up to do with family/friends/life in general when he is home, so again I can understand the busy aspect of things.. I’m not a needy person, but I do text him maybe once a day just to say hello and to say that I hope he’s having a good day or that he was on my mind.. I feel like I’m getting some mixed messages now about whether or not he wants to be talking or even moving forward with hanging out. I’ve noticed at times that he has been active on social media after not responding to my texts right away.. I am somewhat inclined to straight up ask him if he still shares my interest in hanging out more and if he sees me as a possible girlfriend, but again it comes down to appearing needy or coming across too strong too early in the game. Is it better to be forward and ask straight up? Or should I just ride it out, stop messaging him for a while and see what happens? Could this just be an indication of his texting habits and maybe I’m reading into it too much?
Men are all about the game of cat and mouse. They love to chase females and they love it when a woman leaves them on the edge of their seat wanting more. And for that reason, you need to be mysterious- even through text messages. If he asks you what you’re doing, don’t just tell him you’re bored alone at home. Maybe you could take an extra couple minutes to text him back and say, “Oh, sorry it’s taking me so long to text back right now! My hands are kind of full at the moment. I’ll text you in about an hour”. That makes him wonder- what is this girl up to?
I humbly offer a different perspective. At 65, I am at a different age spectrum of many of your commenters. I have an FI that meets my needs now and heading into the future. A few years ago I suddenly lost my beloved husband of nearly 30 years. The struggle and searching journey proceeding from that massive loss has transformed much of my worldview. Chris and I shared an epic love. We started out with very little but a shared passionate attachment. But we held similar ethical standards, a commitment to hard work, the willingness to work in therapy when we derailed, love of parenting and so much more. We embraced joy and general silliness whenever possible. We put our love first…always.
@Meghan, I have a similar mindset as you. I’d rather avoid the drama that comes with dating and just build something myself. Every date is time away from the goals that I have and I much rather be spending time on things that matter to me rather than trying to “convince” someone to continue to date me. If it doesn’t work out, then perhaps it is meant to be that I don’t have it. I can always find something new to work on if a door is really truly closed. There are plenty of new opportunities that come out each and every year-so it’s just a matter of finding the right one.
6. Be open to what he wants to try in the bedroom. If he says “you’re Benjamin Franklin and I’m a space goat,” just do it! If he wants to cry after prematurely ejaculating, just let him! Then make him a snack. But most importantly, be open to what he wants OUT of the bedroom. In general, just do what he says, always, because one way to make a man love you forever and ever is to pretend you’re a living doll.

This was by far the most common advice you’ll find: don’t just text someone “hey.” In fact, if you browse some online dating profiles you’ll probably find people sharing the same advice. While writing the book Modern Romance, comedian Aziz Ansari and Dr. Eric Klinenberg, Professor of Sociology at New York University, organized hundreds of focus groups to decipher the modern dating landscape. When they asked the focus groups about their personal texts, they found that participants unanimously agreed that the “hey” text is a bad idea.

Good Texts To Send To A Guy


Confused as I can possibly be. Our phone conversations are fantastic – we talk about everything, very in depth conversations about different things. Now I haven’t heard from him in more than a day and I literally have no idea why that is. We usually text every day – he recently had a large work project which he told me he would me very unavailable, so I didn’t expect any texts but he would still send me something during the day just a quick “I miss you” or “Thinking of you”. He is back, we have texted and talked by phone then yesterday – nothing – for the first time in 3 months – absolutely nothing. I text him yesterday day morning to say I hoped his meetings went well and that I knew he would be awsome in his work and that I was thinking of him. He has just started a new personal project that he is working on and we have talked about extensively. And now NOTHING!!!! He has told me he more than cares for me and that one day it’s just all going to come spilling out. He and I talk about the unusual connection we both feel and on and on. I am just so torn because I have feelling for this person and from everything he has said, he does as well. I have not text him since yesterday morning and I do not plan to. I feel like the ball is in his court at this point. I just enjoy him so much and as I said, I care for him. I have a very full life myself so I am busy with projects of my own. So I understand very much being busy. I just find it odd that during his other busy times, he still found a second to send me a quick message and now….????? I have told him how those little messages make me feel special and how much I appreciate him taking the time to send me that to let me know he is thinking of me. Almost as soon as I acknowledged those things – he hasn’t done it. He asks me if I am happy – and I answer that I am – because I am a happy person – I don’t rely on him to make me happy – he ads to my happiness however, which perhaps I should tell him that in that way, I usually just answer that questions with a “yes, I am”. And I have been, until right now – I am utterly confused – my heart feels like a small hole has formed for some crazy reason. HELP!!!!!!!!

Ben, 27, wants a more creative conversation starter. “If you are actively pursuing someone, you better come up with something better than ‘hey’ or you will lose their interest,” he cautions. But don’t underestimate the guy’s ability to play hard to get: “However, if I know someone is interested in me, and maybe I’m playing hard to get, just saying ‘hey’ after a lull in conversation can let them know that I’m still interested, but still give me the control.”

Flirting is absolutely one hundred percent important when it comes to talking- or texting- the guy you’re after. And yes, it’s totally possible to send flirty text messages. Try and say things like, “You looked so hot during football practice today” or maybe “I’m just laying around in bed, wishing you were here with me”. There’s SO many ways to flirt over a text message, and you should do it as often as you see fit. You could even teasingly flirt with him over a text message by saying something like, “Umm…I hate to break it to you but I TOTALLY saw that wicked fall in gym class. Hehe, clutz!” Again, don’t go overboard as this may make you appear desperate and maybe even easy- and that’s definitely something you want to avoid.


I started seeing a guy in June and we would either go out to dinner, have dinner at his place with his friends over or have a nice home made meal at my place about every week to 2 weeks. We always stayed the night at each others places and never a rush to leave each other. We never text in between seeing each other because we would just wait to talk when we got together. He was only visiting my town for the summer for work and now his moved back home which is only 2.5 hours away. I told him before he left that I want to keep intouch. He said he also wants to stay in touch, he wants me to come visit him and he said he will also come visit me. Now that he’s gone I don’t know how often to text him. We never did much texting when he was here. I haven’t seen him in 2 weeks and have not heard from either. In that time I only text him twice, with no response. Was it just a summer fling? Should I just give him time to settle in at home and wait to see if he text or calls me?

#22. Be calm when he is stressed – When a man is stressed it can be a HUGE problem, because he acts out of character, is unpredictable, may lash out at you, and may withdraw.BUT, instead of blaming him and arguing, just be calm and let the storm pass. He needs to know that you UNDERSTAND him in that area, and doesn’t need a woman who makes it all about “herself” when he has something stressful going on.
* Be where rich men are. We tend to end up with people who roam our environment. Pilots date stewardesses, cooks date waitresses, bartenders date everything that moves, doctors date nurses, and Facebook employees date Twitter nerds. The majority of men over 30 who work in banking, management consulting, high tech, big law, and venture capital are on the path to top tier wealth if they keep on saving and working for just one more decade. Attend charity events, volunteer programs, or opening night galas. Rich men love to network while supporting a cause. Lay on a beach at a five-star Hawaiian resort. All Hawaiian beaches are public. Take up traditionally expensive sports like golf and less so tennis which have private clubs. Go to alumni mixers with a friend who went to a prestigious university. There are at least 700,000 men in America (out of 1.4 million $380,000+ tax returns) out there after all.

Gently graze your lips (keeping them as dry as possible) across his forehead, looping slowly over to his temple and then down to his mouth. This dry brushing, as Hess calls it, will have a completely different feel from the usual wet kiss. That's because the face is covered with nearly invisible fuzz called vellum hairs. A slight, subtle touch will activate these hairs, inducing sublime shivers.

First conversations are a wild card, but just use the situation you’re in to guide you, and be relaxed and informal. If you’re at an exhibition, talk about the painting that really grabs your attention. If you’re in a bar, discuss how shit the cocktail garnishes are. If you’re in the street, ask him if he’s seen an Eat anywhere because you’re desperately craving their little chilli cracker snacks.

Gold digging women are disgusting trash?? What about men who fuck and objectify women with no intentions of caring for her? Women who want financial security vs men who just want a good looking person to bang….What sounds more unreasonable and shallow? “It is amazing the difference in treatment you get when you pull up in an expensive sports car”…Well it is amazing to see the difference between how I’m treated when I’m dressed “sloppily” and in a fat suit vs. how I’m treated when I’m showing a face full of makeup and as little clothing as possible. Men don’t actually love women, they just like what they think women can do for them. Yeah…it goes both ways dude.

How To Know A Guy Likes You


Don't be afraid to make a move. Let's be real: a good man doesn't desperately need any person; he would like to meet a good person. If he's a good man, he will appreciate the compliment to his attractiveness, at the very least. But remember that compliments are usually given to acquaintances - people who are intimate usually have a more honest connection, with playful teasing and banter. Think of good relationships between brothers and sisters, parents and children, especially couples - they're always joking, laughing, teasing, flirting in a positive way. A woman who is always complimenting may simply be boring and look desperate. Even if you are old-fashioned and never want to be the woman who asks a man for a date, you can still go out of your way to talk to him, and arrange to be with him. Don't overdo this, however; unless he is already attracted to you before the encounter, the more obvious it is that you've put a ton of time into the encounter without his direct encouragement, the more desperate and less attractive you look. Work on building attraction first.
Be yourself. If you're not, then how else would you know if he likes you for who you are? If you are pretending to be someone you are not, you will feel uncomfortable every time you are around him and that is the last thing you would like to happen. If you are uncomfortable around him, it would probably be hard to talk to him and if you can't talk to him, it will be hard to keep a relationship.
Hi Ryan. I am very intrigued by your mindset because I find it is the masculine version of my own. Although I have been “analyzing” myself for some time now and especially myself in relationships, i have never been able to successfully articulate not only what I want but who I am because of the way I think, as beautifully as you were able to in your reply. I do enjoy performance based love as well. Although I have been told constantly I am beautiful enough to not need much depth or skill. I feel there is a world full of beautiful people. Feeling like I give my best at everything I do (and I have VERY high standards) is important to my sense of self worth.
Turns out Bryce got a flesh-eating bacteria in his sinuses, which he dramatically told me could have killed him. While I dearly wish I had a picture of nearly consumed Bryce to put on this post, I more dearly want you to understand the message. USUALLY his lack of response means absolutely nothing and you giving attention to it creates a mess that never needed to be. It would be far  better for you to be the one that is “too busy” to text the guy back. Keep the power in your court as long as you can.

As single millennials, the “Should I text him first?” inevitably pops up in my friend group chats from time to time, followed by thorough deliberation. This time, I went straight to the source for the answers to what, if anything, is appealing about “the chase” when it comes to texting, what the game is about, and how to play. Five guys, ages 20 – 30, opened up about what goes through their minds before they hit send.
The greatest appeal that many men working toward their wealth have for me is that they have a growth-oriented mindset built into them already. I’ve seen too many complacent people who just want to work and then come home and watch TV or drink or something. I’m the type of person who will work all day, maybe have an hour of leisure time, and then go do more enriching activities, whether it’s more work, a hobby (such as learning musical instruments), or stimulating conversations. I like that “rich” people who are self-made seem to value improving themselves and the world around them.
If it never seems to happen, remember there's no rush, especially when you're young and fancy-free. Some people have a new snogging partner every week, but you have to ask yourself whether you want a fling or something more meaningful. If it's the latter, you might have to be patient before you hook up with your prize catch, but when it does happen, it will be worth the wait!
I have heard Matthew Hussey speak on the radio and I was looking forward to reading his book, bu I was dissapointed to learn that after every chapter I had to sign in to the websiteand become a paid member in order to look t th video that accompanied each chapter......I felt thi was more of a pay as you go long "help book" than anyhing else.......I was extremely dissapointed and expected more from the author.......
They never call (probably because they're too intoxicated to remember they promised to). I don't see them all week, then the weekend parties roll around; they get a little Budweiser in them, become all excited when they see me, apologize, start feeding me lines, and we hook up again! I'm a good person! I deserve a nice guy. It's just really frustrating! —Stop Me Before I Do Something Stupid!
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