So I’ve been dating a guy for a few months, he always seems into me when we’re together but doesn’t communicate well. He rarely will text or call. He rarely will make plans but when I ask him to do something he is always willing and we have a great time. He always is very affectionate and have never pushed sex. He always compliments me and has told me several times he likes me. He is alway a gentleman when out, opening door, pulling out my chair etc. I feel confused about the whole situation, but I really really really like him.
I dated a rich man for 5 years. It was easier some ways but harder in others. He was so into his work and money that even when he was home he was on his phone and not paying much attention to me. We were in love….kinda I guess. I think we both just really wanted someone to love…or just not be alone anyway. But he payed for everything. And he bought me cars and expensive clothes and jewelry and anything I wanted and we ate at the Best restaurants. It changed me a little. I was wearing only name brands and acted like I was so cool and I was never someone that ever thought I was better than everyone. It was just being in that lifestyle I felt like I could have anything and if I couldn’t I would yell or get someone fired or just be a bitch to get it. But it was what I learned from him and when I realized how I was changing like that I didn’t like it so I actually tried changing him to be more like me and he tried and he’s a total city guy and I’m a country girl so very different people. Anyway I realized that money doesn’t solve everything. He would have done anything for money and I would have done anything for love.
Okay, now, I’m not saying you need to talk about the way molecules function (unless of course you two are into that kind of thing). But you should AT LEAST be able to hold a bit of an intelligent conversation from time to time. For instance: if he starts talking about something from history (that’s well known), don’t play the dumb card. Let him know you know what he’s talking about. Now, if you really DON’T know what he’s saying, then feel free to say a comment such as “Wow, that’s really interesting. I’d love to hear more about that!” That shows him that even if you’re not aware of some things, you’re eager to learn. And men love that.
Despite what you may think or your past experience — you may never know just how much a man really does want to please you if he is able. In fact, the problems show up when he no longer thinks he can please you. Men are very simple creatures. They demonstrate their value by solving problems and fixing things (and occasionally they may make the mistake of trying to fix you).
Being single isn't for everyone. Do you want a strong hand to hold? The faint smell of cologne as you hug your guy? Or just someone to make you feel special. If you long for a boyfriend but seem to be having trouble getting one, read this article for some helpful hints to get you on your way to finding true love (and a nice, warm cuddle partner). This may not work for everybody, but these are some helpful tips to help you with your life!
To each her own. You can be a power player and prove to yourself, the world or to whomever all you want, but you cannot tell other women what they “should” do with there own lives. Your living situation is not the desired norm. Not everyone see’s the human population as two massive armies in oppostion (men versus women) but rather as unequal masses that function better as counter weights for each-other, just as you have found your own counter weight (closeted hubby or long haired wife). As long as men and women are (mostly) different, we can never be truly equal. Not a good or bad thing, thats just how it is.
As for the very emotional and negative comments – maybe its because people don’t want to believe that its so easy to get a rich husband/boyfriend. That the core was ‘self-value’. That money isn’t a demon. That it offers choices and experiences and satisfaction from life. This article makes us question ourselves and then when we don’t like what we realise….then we lash out.
I like your article. Thank you. I feel I do most of this already and by that I mean keep things light and positive. But one thing I will never get used to is the ghosting thing. This article says don’t call a guy cruel and call his character into question. But it is cruel. That’s exactly what it is. To have someone that you liked just ignore you and act like you don’t matter.
How To Get A Guy To Love You Again
This guy added me on Facebook about a year ago and then messaged me on my birthday to ask me out for coffee.. At the time I was dating someone else and had to decline based on that and told him I appreciated the invite. A few months ago that boyfriend and I parted ways and a couple weeks ago I messaged that guy on Facebook and we started chatting for hours at a time online and eventually via text and seemed to really hit it off.. This last week we hung out several times and had a lot of fun. It seems he is into me by the way he talks and acts around me and I’ve made it clear I’m into him. However, since we hung out he hasn’t been the one to text me first and has been really inconsistent at times with when he eventually got around to texting me back. Either he takes up to 24 hours to reply or sometimes doesn’t reply at all. When we hung out he stated he had a lot on his mind right now and has been a bit stressed out with work. He works out of town on a 7 on 7 off schedule and seems to obviously have a lot of catching up to do with family/friends/life in general when he is home, so again I can understand the busy aspect of things.. I’m not a needy person, but I do text him maybe once a day just to say hello and to say that I hope he’s having a good day or that he was on my mind.. I feel like I’m getting some mixed messages now about whether or not he wants to be talking or even moving forward with hanging out. I’ve noticed at times that he has been active on social media after not responding to my texts right away.. I am somewhat inclined to straight up ask him if he still shares my interest in hanging out more and if he sees me as a possible girlfriend, but again it comes down to appearing needy or coming across too strong too early in the game. Is it better to be forward and ask straight up? Or should I just ride it out, stop messaging him for a while and see what happens? Could this just be an indication of his texting habits and maybe I’m reading into it too much?
So there’s this guy that I’m very much interested and I have just started talking with. Things have been going good,but I’ve noticed I’m the only one asking questions trying to get to know him better.we text each other but he too takes hours to respond.before I read your article and watched the 7 secrets video. I sent him a text saying ” I have to be honest I feel like you’re losing interest in me.” Should I have sent him that text?
Walk away from him, Bhavya. Do you really want to plan settling down with a guy who takes you for granted? He’s expecting you to hang around for three years before he makes up his mind. That’s crazy and cruel. Either you’ll find another guy or he’ll chase you because he sees how much he misses you. Either option has got to be better than where you’re at now. If you do nothing, you’re telling him it is okay to treat you badly. Not a good message to send if you’re looking for a long term relationship.
I simply find this so amusing! What a truly funny article! At 38, I truly had no idea, either men or women were dating simply based on ones financial portfolio! All of the wonderfully amusing, yet sadly not at all original tips, on dating are and do truly apply to dating in general. So successful or more successful men and women are a catch and you’ve got to be a great fisherman or women or your true (suger daddy?) motives will be snuffed out and fast! Your own breeding and lack of maybe money or simply ambition to do anything other than marry some that you gals certainly could have (with hard work) made yourself is really a bit slutty!
#29. MAINTAIN his interest – Marriage is a LONG-term relationship, which means that you will consciously have to make efforts to keep his interest. You won’t be able to keep his interest if he knows EVERYTHING about you, and nothing changes. This is why it’s important to learn new things, new skills, and to create a life outside the relationship so that you have things to keep and spark his interest.
Brian I completely understand where you are coming from. Life is busy. Having dreams and goals make for a busy life and then add in a social calendar and honestly I don’t know where or how to find time that someone else in your life demands. I find myself wanting a relationship but also know that I have a limited amount of time and am always wondering how well received that will be from a good man. My thought has been that I would have to stop living my life to be able to be “available ” for someone else’s life. I guess I believe in fate and that the right person will come along when least expected. Good luck with all your endeavors and your search for love and a life of happiness
Practice the Golden Rule. If you want him to do something, you should be equally willing to do it yourself. You want him to ask you out or take you out or do whatever else for you? You should be equally willing, and don't wait for or expect him to do it first. Good men respect a person who applies the same rules to themself that they would apply to a man.
Make him feel needed. Doing things to make your guy feel needed may increase his feelings of affection for you. Asking him to help you with something or even just asking for his advice can make him feel needed and important. For example, you might ask him to help you move some furniture in your bedroom or ask him to help you make a decision about your car insurance.
Show him what's unique about you, but remember to be yourself when you talk to him. This is especially important if he's the kind of guy who's used to having others approach him. It's important that you try to stand out a bit, but don't change who you are. Don’t just be another person pursuing him for his looks, take an interest in him as a person and show him who you are too. Show your favourite parts of who you are! Let him get to know you. Have your limits ( a guy worth dating will be okay with that), but don't be afraid to try new things. Does he listen to a band you've never heard of, or never bothered to listen to? Give it a try, you might like them! If you put forth the effort and create a genuine opinion, even if it (respectfully) differs from his, it can at least give you something to talk about.
I just came across this article while I am panicking waiting for a response from a man. Thanks, it’s a good read. I met him 2 weeks ago outside a club, and asked for his number, which he gave me. I text him the day after and he replied very fast, but then I noticed he was matching my response times. Our last communication was 3 days ago, I text him today and 4 hours later, still waiting for a reply! He said he would know about something we had discussed on Monday (yesterday) but he never got back to me. We haven’t arranged a proper first date yet, although he has mentioned “we should go out so some weekend”
I don’t know how I have never read your advice columns before, but these have made me feel like I know more than ever before. So I have been talking to this guy that I met online in January. We have not met yet because I was away at school and only just got home. He initiated the relationship and used to be incredibly attentive to me. He would text me, sext me, call me…it was great. All of a sudden he says we are moving too fast and now he rarely texts me at all. He doesn’t answer my texts some times and it makes me crazy because he claims to want to talk to me more and meet me but I don’t know what to think. Please help.
I moved to LA after two years in New York, where there are a plethora of guys my age. Unfortunately, though I did go on dates, nothing stuck. Now, I’ve moved across the country. There could be a guy, even a friend of a friend (the perfect set-up!), currently living in New York who would be happy to be my boyfriend, but I’ll never know. Frequently, on the street in New York, I’d walk by a guy I could picture myself dating, and I’d want to blurt out, “What bar will you be at on Saturday, and why weren’t you also at The Jane last Saturday night like I was?!” Which brings me to: