A guy in my church was madly interested in me, but the church members in my congregation fiercely oppose to him dating me. To them he should choose another who are their friend. He no longer in my congregation, but, he is still interested. The church members lied about me, spread a bunch of lies. He’s good friend with them, but i don’t communicate with him. I called and texted him once, he hasn’t replied back. I occasionally see him. When he sees me i can tell that his world lights up. I believe i love this guy too very much. Everywhere i go i carry him in my spirit. Can i tell him how i feel about him? I want to move on. What do you suggest???

True, I have no blog and am a consumer of PF blogs only, a point not lost on me and that I freely give to Sam (backup a couple posts and read my comments), however, I call bullshit when I see it Janey. Though I disagree with Sam on occasion, I make an effort to give him a hat tip as well for the massive effort he puts into his posts-this isn’t lost on me.


If the man uses his wealth to be arrogant and flashy, while treating women like disposable objects that they can buy off, this would just add to my mistrust in a man, and make me feel unstable. If I am required to be fashionably uncomfortable and walk in heels to attract a wealthy man, or fake like I care about solving world hunger and feeding Somalian children (which will never be solved, btw, as long as family planning is not valued) I would personally find it a sacrifice on my natural health and personal morals. So instead of a man having the effect that it naturally should on me, as a stable, protective, provider, money would have the opposite effect.

Hi Eric, thank you for the wonderful advice! A few weeks ago I was driving myself crazy thinking I had done something wrong. I’m playing the waiting game right now and every time I feel like texting or calling, I read your articles again to drum it into my brain to stop! I’ll update when he comes around, but in the mean time, I’m keeping busy with my own stuff!

Get A Guy To Like You Again


I appreciate that this book is about subtle nuances too. Often we don't know what we do wrong because it's not anything big but a subtle signal, and we don't know why our positive signals are ignored & that's because they are TOO subtle. This advice rang true because I've noted men in general communicate more with action & are generally MORE sensitive than women, meaning they need LOUDER positive signals & SOFTER negative ones. The author refers to this as the "fragile male ego" which is really SENSITIVITY.
There was a clear divide here. Two out of three of the 20 – 23 year olds said there is nothing appealing about someone being “hard to get.” David, 20, clarifies, “It makes them seem conceited and uninterested.” Nate, 30, weighs in with the younger crowd on this one, stating that “nothing” is appealing about a girl who is “hard to get.” He advocates the “straight to the point” approach: “I am always one who is aggressive and goes after what I want. You know pretty quickly if someone is into you or if you are into them. Whether it’s via text, at a bar or Steak ‘n Shake, “hard to get” is a thing of the past. I have noticed over past 3-4 years even females have been more aggressive in pursuit.”

If only humanity can bypass all the surface stuff and tap into the tender, unselfish and unconditional care for one another, it will be better. But, not in a shack or on a mat on the floor. Its just a condition people generally don’t strive for, in any century. And for centuries, mind you, income earned by women lagged behind men due to the structure of society, so now there’s still this issue.
If he wants a relationship, he’ll make an effort. If he’s not willing to do the work or put in the time, it means that you’re just not important to him. Do you really want to go after a guy who doesn’t see you as a priority in his life? If you’re doing all the work and he never even meets you in the middle, you’re just going to end up exhausted and unsatisfied. Remember — guys who have a real interest know how to make an effort.
There's a catch though: If you want to snag his immediate interest, the change has to be guy-visible. "To activate his desire, it has to be a departure from your everyday look," says David Buss, PhD, author of The Evolution of Desire. Maybe take a break from your jeans routine and strut around in a miniskirt. Wear a noticeably higher heel. Or ditch your bra for a day and put a little extra bounce in your step.
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Yes, humans like to feel needed. No, they don't want to feel as though you might collapse into a boneless snivelling heap if they're not around. "A woman who knows what she likes and makes every effort to get it is very attractive," says Kerner. "In fact, when a woman like that needs someone it makes them feel all the more valuable – because it's as though she needs them specifically, rather than just any old person."
1.Continue to learn (formally or through travel and simply teaching ones self). I chose more informal (while I did take courses at the local Community College I enjoyed emensly they were taken for a reason to learn such as business law etc. I learned how to better Manage WIRK & Personal Aspects of my life and not get sued over a silly emotion like anger also I was armed with the knowledge to better protect myself civilly and legally and how to protect the company’s I worked for! I continue to tune in my knowledge annually and look for changes to the law! SO, UNDER THE TUTILAGE IF AN ADORING JUDGE, I learned how to best protect my own finances and my future. At 2/ w/so much on the line Being Fired was not an option! So simply winning the war and not simply a battle in my personal life & my career. CHECK! Do continue to educate yourself. I enjoy reading legal briefs! As simply rediculous as it sounds, I love it! ,read what makes you happy! Travel will enlighten you so go to Cartagena Colombia like we did for a couple of weeks! You’ll be shocked at what a totally different culture can teach you!
My parents discourage our relationship because they think we are not compatible financially. They prefer me to get married to a man who is more financially independent. There are doctors going after me. My friends and colleagues also think that I should find a guy who has the same financial status and social status as me. Many people believe that there will be high chances of divorce if the wife can earn more than the husband due the ego of the men.
It is true that time is the most valuable thing. I’ve worked straight through the end of my college years plus another 8 to get where I am. I find myself working non stop and feeling out of place if I take more than a day off or sit around for a few hours just because I feel tired. Pretty much most women I’ve dated spend most of the relationship complaining that I work to much. They just don’t understand that I got where I am by making good use of my time and I do not want to get lazy and possibly lose everything that I built up.

#2 No vomit texts. If he asks you how your day was, I know you want to tell him all the exciting or non-exciting things that happened, but that ends up as one giant, never-ending paragraph. Take it easy, no one wants to read an entire book from one text message. That being said, don’t give him a one-word answer either. A couple sentences are short and to the point. [Read: A step-by-step guide to texting your crush]
I say several times in the article that this stuff could apply just as easily to a man as a woman. So, that’s kind of the opposite of a sexist… I mean, yeah, I’m going to address an audience of women because this is a women’s site, but I repeatedly, explicitly write that I’m talking about behaviors that men and women mistakenly do and it has the same damaging effect regardless of gender.
Anyways, enough about my feelings, the point I’m making is that every message you send your man should be exciting. Now, I know this can be tough, especially if you have the kind of relationship where you communicate daily through texts, and share those little mundane thoughts and updates, but seriously, believe me when I say it’s time to stop. From here on out you want to make sure that every text message you send is captivating and exciting! I’ll touch more on this later.
Been there, done that. I don’t honestly know if you can ever be 100% sure if a woman loves you for you unless you pretend to be “poor”. I clicked on this article for the same reason you did. Gold digging woman are disgusting trash. I have done “social experiments” on them. Like pulling up to a coffee stand in an old beat up car and asking a woman on a date. It is amazing the difference in treatment you get when you pull up in an expensive sports car. Yes almost all of them are gold diggers. I had a poor girlfriend who I helped tremendously. Paid her medical bills, took care of her vehicle needs, nice vacations. She let her true feelings out telling me that I was a “piece of garbage selfish A$$hole” when I wouldn’t pay off her student loans and send her to alcohol rehab. Not that I couldn’t afford it, but I hate being treated like an ATM machine. I have these problems and I am only 35 years old, an average 5’9″ tall, good looking and well built from working out all of my life. I have come to the conclusion that woman don’t actually love a man, they love what they perceive they can gain from him, or what he can do for her. Then you have to get a prenup and everything else. That is why so many men, moneyed or not are going MGTOW. I hate to tell you, but you will never be able to buy this woman’s happiness with money, she will bleed you dry. That is the kind of woman that I had, and I was much happier when I sent her down the road. I know the kind of closeness and love you are talking about wanting from a woman, but this one, unless she has an epiphany, will never give it to you. I have friends with old fashioned foreign wives that love them through thick and thin, truly for better or worse, for richer or poorer I have seen it with my own eyes, it does exist. You may have to start over. Good luck and God bless. As for me, time to hide the wealth again and find a down to earth farm girl.
* Take care of yourself. Because rich men have more selection, they tend to gravitate towards better looking, fitter women. The one thing every person can do is work on their fitness – facial features not so much. There’s a big fear from men that once he marries his woman that she will chop off all her hair and let herself go. Don’t let your man fear such a thing by eating healthy and maintaining a workout regime that’s beyond his own. When a woman asks a rich man to see whether he’d like to join her at the gym, deep down the rich man is beaming with joy.

2. Be a hot mama, not a prospective mama. "Men have a radar for detecting women who are baby hungry," warns Christie Kelleher, director of the New York office of Kelleher & Associates, an upscale matchmaking service for successful professionals. Kelleher, whose service has brought together about 6,000 marriages in 19 years, adds, "He's thinking, 'Whoa—I don't even know your middle name, and I already know the colors you want to paint your kid's nursery.'" Your best bet: no baby talk!


Similarity, in terms of personality, doesn’t necessarily mean you have to be mirror images of each other (in fact that might get a little boring). The important thing here is being open to each other’s interests.  If he likes hockey, watch a game with him at least once or twice. If he’s a country music guy, and you can’t get enough hip-hop, well, at least you can both appreciate a strong love for music.
I like your article. Thank you. I feel I do most of this already and by that I mean keep things light and positive. But one thing I will never get used to is the ghosting thing. This article says don’t call a guy cruel and call his character into question. But it is cruel. That’s exactly what it is. To have someone that you liked just ignore you and act like you don’t matter.
Men may shift their feelings into another arena. Men may express emotions only in places where they feel safe, and where the expression of feelings is considered acceptable. Just look at how men act at sports events: It's not uncommon to see them express great exuberance and affection, giving each other hugs and high-fives. Football and hockey players, thought of as some of the most "macho" men around, appear quite comfortable expressing their feelings with each other during a game. Where else would you see men slapping each other playfully on the butt? Put these same men in another context, and you probably wouldn't see the same level of openness and comfort.
Where do I go to meet the best men? Why do the guys I like so much just stop calling and how do I get the guy I like to get to the next level? These are questions that so many women find themselves asking and it can be so tough to find the right guy! How To Get The Guy from coach Matthew Hussey is the secret to getting immediate results in your love life. Our dating tips are designed specifically for women, with knowledge drawn from working with men seeking love themselves. We know how men work, their thoughts, their feelings and what makes them tick and I know how to hook them in for good. So check out our 10 amazing videos with the best relationship tips for women.
You’re right I may be portraying women too gloriously, but I suspect the kind of women you’re talk to are young (early 20s). Of course young women fantasize about having money and spending it more than having kids. But despite what these women say, thoughts of kids will come up eventually.. either as a way to “secure” the man or their priorities will change; believe it or not, women will get bored and if a rich man can’t offer love and attention as readily as a poor man will, kids will do the job!
I feel bad for u… I feel bad she was an alcoholic.. But don’t give up there are a lot of girls out there that have motive they have good incentives.. I’m an average girl.. But everyone exept the person I’m with tell me I’m such a kind person I have customers come to me random to just thank me for helping them thanking me for being thoughtful thanking me for taking the time to just b understanding and kind.. Sometimes the good girls are disguised.. They work in retail.. Or ur local shops.. Take time to talk to one see i work in a pretty wealthy town.. I don’t judge.. Lol in fact if I guy ever rolled up next to me in a nice car or a beater.. I’d be confused.. Especially if it’s a nice car In fact I probably wouldn’t even think that ur actually talking to me and keep going.. And then me being a careful loyal girl.. The first thing I always say to someone trying to talk to me I’m in a relationship.. I believe to hide nothing.. Always tell the truth.. And if u ain’t got nothing nice to say don’t say nothing at all..
If you don't, perhaps you should consider wishing him well and walking away. But if you're confident the two of you can work it out, then give it a go. I do think one thing you should ask him is to promise he will phone you and tell you if ever he meets another woman he wants to sleep with. So you both know your relationship is over before he comes home and lies to you.
Maybe that’s true. But personally, with rich/successful guys, asking for money is like the WORST thing you can do. Even if your kids are like dying or you have to live on the street. You should be REALLY careful (and really just avoid altogether) asking for financial help of any kind. Just drop hints you’re struggling financially and if he really cares about you, HE will make the decision to give you money (and really the decision needs to be his). This is SO important.
I met a guy and we met on a Friday night which is rare to begin with. He then preceded to ask me out Saturday night so all was good. We went out the next 2 weekends and started to talk about my personal life. I am in a situation similar to a situation that he just got out of with a 5 year GF. As soon as he found out my Mom lived with me he told me he needed time. A few days time is what he said he needed, but I couldn’t let it go, I kept hounding him and text bombing him. He has not replied to any of my texts for a week now. Is there any chance of getting him back?

Anyways, good advice for single women. I think there comes a point in most of our lives where a successful man becomes more attractive to us than a pretty man. Maybe this happens at about 25. I’m attending the wedding this weekend of a friend who is marrying a very successful guy and he is totally smitten by her – she is gorgeous, a fantastic surfer (better than him), a great cook and has a good legal career of her own.

Things Guys Like To Hear In Text Messages


I used be the type of girl who got worried when a guy didn’t text back but now I don’t care cause I realised if a guy is really into you he will text you and we all get busy. I used to look at my phone at times hoping he would read my brain signals. The first think I have learnt with my new job is texts can be distracting especially when you’re in the middle of a line of thought trying to do your duties at work. You want to text back but you don’t respond as you get caught up in whatever you’re doing and the texting can drag on, sometimes you’re tired you want to respond but your so stressed out that you just want piece and lastly it can be hard at times, I know with myself I admit I have been faced with this dilemma one to many times if a guy is that into he will text you when his free. Eric I think this logic applies to both men and women .Thanks to your straight out truth I have come to not care so much as I did before if a guy liked text me because what is worrying going to do nothing and really ladies do we want to spend time messaging the guy who doesn’t put any effort at all and just cut our loses before we realise he is just not that into me or wait until the right one comes along who makes the effort and is really into us.

First, let’s look at the possible reasons a man will text back and some of the common reasons he won’t. Afterward, I am going to explain some mindset shifts that will make him more likely to text back, give your relationship the best chance of succeeding and then finally give you specific tips and tricks that will increase the chance of him texting you back.


Some people can’t keep up with your bold spirit — but that’s their problem, not your's! Amazing opportunities come to you because you rarely back away from what you want, and your boldness will weed out any crushes who can’t commit to the adventure. Find someone who matches your fervor for life — or consider a shyer soul who will appreciate your take-charge attitude.

#8 Leave out the word “just.” I know, it’s a small word, I mean, what could possibly go wrong with this word. The word ‘just’ is fine. However, it actually gives your sentence low-value. Specifically, when you talk about yourself. For example, “I’m at the beach” and “I’m just at the beach.” Do you see how the word ‘just’ makes your activity look insignificant?
The explanations of male thinking is also not "boys will be boys" trash that insists sexist and misogynistic behaviors are simply "biological" for men & have to be tolerated by women. Instead of making excuses, the author manages to be honest & fair in describing common male mindsets & how & why certain negative attitudes/behaviors are triggered (much as stereotypical female negative behaviors can be triggered by crappy moves on a guys' part). Since a relationship is a dynamic, it's only fair to adjust what you can control - yourself. So you learn very subtle methods to hone your social & dating skill to basically COMMUNICATE in a way that men in general will grasp correctly.
#8 Leave out the word “just.” I know, it’s a small word, I mean, what could possibly go wrong with this word. The word ‘just’ is fine. However, it actually gives your sentence low-value. Specifically, when you talk about yourself. For example, “I’m at the beach” and “I’m just at the beach.” Do you see how the word ‘just’ makes your activity look insignificant?
Nora's smart BUT she wants to be popular. So when she moved schools, her plan: never admit to anyone that she's actually smart, dumb down her subjects from AP classes to regular ones, join the cheer squad, and date the hottest, most popular, and possibly one of the dumbest guy in school, Jake. But when Adam enters the equation, her plans changed OR has to change.

Starting right above his knee, plant a light-as-a-feather kiss there, then work your way up, increasing the pressure of your lips on his skin the farther you go. That's exactly what Lisa, 36, does to get her husband primed for super hot sex. "Women typically think men don't like foreplay, but my husband loves this," she says. "And sometimes I'll prolong the agony by starting over again down at his other knee. He goes crazy with anticipation."


* Be where rich men are. We tend to end up with people who roam our environment. Pilots date stewardesses, cooks date waitresses, bartenders date everything that moves, doctors date nurses, and Facebook employees date Twitter nerds. The majority of men over 30 who work in banking, management consulting, high tech, big law, and venture capital are on the path to top tier wealth if they keep on saving and working for just one more decade. Attend charity events, volunteer programs, or opening night galas. Rich men love to network while supporting a cause. Lay on a beach at a five-star Hawaiian resort. All Hawaiian beaches are public. Take up traditionally expensive sports like golf and less so tennis which have private clubs. Go to alumni mixers with a friend who went to a prestigious university. There are at least 700,000 men in America (out of 1.4 million $380,000+ tax returns) out there after all. 

Maintain a balance. In the beginning of a relationship, it is important to spend lots of time together. During this time, you are just getting to know each other and spending time together should be fun. Don’t fight this urge to spend lots of time with him when you are just starting out, but know when to pull it back. The "scarcity principle" suggests that people are more likely to want and value something that's a bit hard to get.[10] This doesn't mean you have to play mind games with your guy, but make sure that you're not available at the drop of a hat every time he calls. Maintain a good balance between spending time with him and spending time on your own.
Thanks for this insightful post... Yup, sure feels like a double or even triple bind. I'm supposed to be emotionally available, but also strong and brave and self reliant and have all the answers and be able to deal with everything fearlessly...and heaven help me if I express doubt, fear, anxiety, shame, what if I say "I feel from being orphaned in childhood I am unlovable and unloved.." Wow..that will get you stared at as a basket case, a damaged person...
This was by far the most common advice you’ll find: don’t just text someone “hey.” In fact, if you browse some online dating profiles you’ll probably find people sharing the same advice. While writing the book Modern Romance, comedian Aziz Ansari and Dr. Eric Klinenberg, Professor of Sociology at New York University, organized hundreds of focus groups to decipher the modern dating landscape. When they asked the focus groups about their personal texts, they found that participants unanimously agreed that the “hey” text is a bad idea.

How I Made Him Fall In Love With Me


You’ve heard that opposites attract? Well, forget about that. Many studies have revealed that people are likely to be attracted to individuals who resemble them. Whether due to social, cultural, developmental or some deeper psychological cause, your man will likely be more attracted to you if you remind him of himself. Cut your hair, start wearing similar clothes, if cosmetic surgery is an option then go for that.

Italiano: Conquistare Un Bravo Ragazzo, Español: encontrar a un buen hombre, Português: Encontrar um Bom Pretendente, Русский: найти хорошего мужчину, Deutsch: Einen guten Mann finden, Français: séduire un homme bien, Bahasa Indonesia: Mendapatkan Pria yang Baik, Nederlands: Een goede man vinden, العربية: الحصول على رجل صالح, 中文: 找一个好男友, ไทย: ได้ผู้ชายที่ดี, Tiếng Việt: Tìm một người đàn ông tốt

Ladies! I can’t stress this enough. We don’t like to be bored, right? So what makes you think he wants to be bothered with a boring, lifeless conversation? Try to stay on interesting topics and when the convo starts fizzing out, try to spark it up once more or let it die. But the worst thing you can do is try and keep a one-word text message conversation going.


Ladies! I can’t stress this enough. We don’t like to be bored, right? So what makes you think he wants to be bothered with a boring, lifeless conversation? Try to stay on interesting topics and when the convo starts fizzing out, try to spark it up once more or let it die. But the worst thing you can do is try and keep a one-word text message conversation going.
Until the day I fell in love with a poor guy who was the love of my life and I decided that I had all the tools to become wealthy on my own. Also, most people don’t share your respect for “resourceful women”. Being an Asian female, society is specifically very hard on “young pretty Asian girls with old rich white guys.” I didn’t want to be that chick. And I didn’t want all of my accomplishments, even if I genuinely did it on my own, to be because I married some wealthy powerful guy. I had been through enough crap not being given enough credit for my accomplishments in my life because I was “pretty”, but I’d lose ALLLL of my credit, past and future, if I married some rich dude. I wanted the respect that came with earning it all on my own. I grew up poor, I worked hard for everything I had, and I didn’t want to be seen as someone who took the easy way out. I mean, I worked hard in school, went to a Tier 1 US college, and studied abroad at one of the highest ranked universities in the world, for what, to impress a rich dude with clever conversation that they don’t usually hear coming out of a model chick’s mouth?
Show your independence. Show him that you are mentally and physically independent. You don’t need him to do everything for you (although he should feel that he can help you sometimes) and that you have a mind of your own. It adds to his vision of you as a fully developed and interesting person with standards. He wants a partner, not a blow-up doll.

How To Make A Guy Into You


Its not the end of the world. Ive seen amazing reconstruction surgeries that are beautiful-working from nothing, and turning out to look better than most womens natural breasts. My advice to you is to remember that your a survivor! And that life goes on. You can and will, do and be, complete and better…im not just saying that. Its a reality if u want it. let go of any heartache and take what you deserve for your life, be happy. Congrats to you! Your so strong!

Texts To Keep A Guy Interested


I have observed a new wave of women who are currently with wealthy men, starting out as former classmates who have studied the same field or at some point (even if they are mothers with children at present) they were the female equal of the wealthy man before they role-played their feminine/masculine traits for family-purposes. Take Micheal Obama or even Hilary Clinton. The two women were married to former presidents of the United States. Michelle Obama was Barack’s adviser and teacher at one point in his law-school background. Michelle Obama went through law school before Barack did. Hilary Clinton was Bill’s classmate in Yale, which is where they originally met and dated.
It’s never a good idea to get involved with a man who is involved with another woman, especially when it’s your friend. You risk ruining your friendship as well as coming across as jealous, angry, manipulative, and a lot of other negative and unattractive qualities. There are lots of great men out there. There’s no need to fight with your best friend for one.
Just read a book about psychology – manipulation – priming & Co for getting to know how to catch someones attention. To make him depending on your attention and love. Do not tell too much about you and be mysterious. Care about your look, but do not annoy him with long talks about styling, beauty OPs & Co. No man is interested in such bullsh*t and therefore you got your friends.
8. During the big game, spit out a sport stat that will really impress him. He will literally look at you the way he’d look at a toaster if that toaster suddenly shouted “I am a sentient being!” That means, when you’re not working 80 hours a week, buying him beer, cooking him snacks, or pegging him senseless, you should be studying up on facts about his favorite sporting ensembles. In a few years, you could become a “cool chick.” To be a “cool chick” is the highest honor to which a woman can aspire.
If you have a feeling something might be taken the wrong way, stop yourself. Laurel House, the author of Screwing the Rules: The No-Games Guide to Love, suggests you take another look at your text before you send it and read it out loud to yourself. When it comes to sticking with safe subject matter, a good rule of thumb is if you wouldn’t talk to them about something in person, you shouldn’t talk about it over text. Lastly, keep your selfies and other pictures to yourself unless it has been okayed by them. Never send unsolicited anything.
Hey Eric! I just wanted to say I have followed a lot of your advice on your posts, & so far it’s been working much better for me than before I knew ANY of this stuff about men. Following your advice I got a really cute guy (who I’ve crushed on for 2 years) go out of his way to ask for my number. Thank you for sharing your knowledge to us & keep it up!
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There was a clear divide here. Two out of three of the 20 – 23 year olds said there is nothing appealing about someone being “hard to get.” David, 20, clarifies, “It makes them seem conceited and uninterested.” Nate, 30, weighs in with the younger crowd on this one, stating that “nothing” is appealing about a girl who is “hard to get.” He advocates the “straight to the point” approach: “I am always one who is aggressive and goes after what I want. You know pretty quickly if someone is into you or if you are into them. Whether it’s via text, at a bar or Steak ‘n Shake, “hard to get” is a thing of the past. I have noticed over past 3-4 years even females have been more aggressive in pursuit.”
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