Hey Eric! I just wanted to say I have followed a lot of your advice on your posts, & so far it’s been working much better for me than before I knew ANY of this stuff about men. Following your advice I got a really cute guy (who I’ve crushed on for 2 years) go out of his way to ask for my number. Thank you for sharing your knowledge to us & keep it up!

I worked with one couple for whom this was the case: Rob had taken a new job several hours away. Emily stayed back, preparing their house for a sale. At the same time, they argued about whether or not to get a dog. Emily argued that a dog would provide her with some needed company, and make her feel secure when alone in their home. In his logical, analytical way, Rob gave her every reason why the timing was not right, for example: How could you show the house with a puppy running around, peeing on the floor? On an intellectual level, Emily knew he was right, but her heart insisted she would be happier with the dog. They went through several weekends during which all they did was fight about the dog issue. Emily thought Rob was being cold and unfeeling. Rob thought Emily was being unreasonable. With much coaxing, Rob agreed to accompany Emily to the local animal shelter “just to look” at dogs. When Rob saw all those rows and rows of dogs in cages, knowing that most of them would probably be put to death, he began sobbing. Emily said she had never seen him cry so hard. She had been thinking to herself that he didn't have any feelings, when nothing could have been further from the truth.
Men are in a "double-bind" when it comes to expressing emotions. Although men may not always know what they're feeling, there's one thing they’re sure about: They’re convinced they’re in a major double bind. Society encourages men to express their feelings, but when they do, their partners are often petrified, if not horrified. Women, they may believe, want their partners to show their feelings, but only certain feelings, and only in doses they can handle. In fact, results from numerous research studies—as well as clinical experience—tells us that men may be right to be wary of women who implore them to show their true feelings. Men who deviate from the traditional masculine norm by being emotionally expressive and talking about their fears are often judged as being poorly adjusted.
Neediness is crippling to the quality of any relationship (whether it’s a guy or woman acting needy) and it’s something you need to prevent from creeping into your mind at all costs.  Needy texts are guaranteed to be ignored by a guy. Personally, I don’t ignore needy texts out of cruelty – I ignore them because it’s an insatiable relationship monster that I don’t ever want to feed (metaphorically speaking).

Hi,so I met this guy on line two months ago. We started chatting regularly and eventually he gave me his phone number. I didn’t use it and instead gave him mine. It took him only couple of days to contact met. Since then we were texting each other pretty much non-stop all day. And most of the time it was him texting first. Eventually after three weeks we arrange a meeting in person. That was four weeks ago. During these four weeks he`d come to see me (he lives 30miles away) every night or every second night and we even spent our days off together. He was so into me and so opened about his feelings towards me. He always wanted to know how I feel about him and he tend to discuss the previous day via txts. He was the one who wanted to establish the relationship straight away (which I thought was a bit weird tbh) making sure that we are exclusive so I wouldn’t date other guys. Then he wanted me to tell my friends about him. Well eventually I did as we seemed to get on better an better. I thought he was quite sensitive and insecure as he kept telling me how he feels and asking me how I see things. Reading between lines it was like he doubted that I could like him. I didn’t get it. He was this typical good looking, cocky football player who spend a lot of time at the gym and posing in front of a mirror. Which I thought was hilarious and I kept laughing every time I saw him doing that. He kept talking about me meeting his children (he has 3) and his family. And also about our future. Quite frankly I thought it was all too quick but I never said a word. Then last weekend he came down to see me (even met two of my girlfriends) and we had a good time as always. He left on Sunday saying that he has a busy week ahead of him and if possible he`d come and see me in the middle of the week. I was completely fine with that. So as usual we spent all Monday texting each other although I though he was a bit distant in his text which I thought was due to his busy work load. On Tuesday he texted less saying he had no signal( which occasionally happened as he also works as gas engineer) and apologised saying he had a long bad day at work and not to ask. So I didn’t ask and just said that its ok that I understand. Since then I`ve not heard from him. I texted him couple of times but no reply. Its been, ,only,, few days but its very unlike him not to text at all. So I am really confused as I don’t know what`s happening.
I totally agree with Brooke. Here is the quote from this article that I find most sexist: ‘Orient your mind towards giving him what he likes, not on what you want to get from him’ . The implicit suggestion here is not to expect anything in return. So send him sexy photos, keep it light and fun to entertain and please him, but when it comes to giving the woman what she wants, i.e. to be heard, loved and respected, then that woman is labelled as ‘needy’. How very convenient for men! A good relationship is about give and take, and men would and should be expected to be respectful towards their women and respond to texts. I am not talking about obsessive and demanding texting, of which men are also guilty, but normal communication between two people who treat each other with love and respect. If a man is not responding to you, then he does not respect and does not appreciate you. You need to move on.

Okay I need some guy advice. I started a new job about 6 months and was immediately attracted to a guy that works there. We do not work for the same company, rather my company works for the company that he works for. I admired him from afar for about a month, simply exchanging hello's when we pass each other in the hallway, until I decided to dive in and let him know that I was interested in getting to know him. We became very flirty and would talk about little things here and there every time we would see each other, which is a lot since it's a small building.
Now before you get all worked up or start panicking that this is a HUGE, seemingly impossible challenge, don’t. Stay calm, and believe me, this isn’t as hard as it seems. Better yet, in this video I’m going to give you text messages that you can use yourself. That means that all you have to do is listen to what I tell you here, and plug in these messages into your phone.

Why Do Men Fall In Love


Seriously? The odds of that happening are about as unlikely as me ending up sitting between three crying babies on my redeye home to Philadelphia for Thanksgiving. (Logically it should almost never happen but believe me, it can). This logistic is why I struggle with the iconic rom-com Serendipity. Sara had it made. She was in the same department of the same Bloomingdale’s at the same time as Jonathan. But, no! She had to throw it away just to prove a point. And she still gets him in the end? Smh. Luckily, in 2017, we have dating apps to control exactly what Sara was too optimistic to appreciate. We can plan to meet at a specific place. Then we can hope we’re not getting cat-fished. Which brings me to:


These questions to ask a guy or girl over text are great because chatting with someone over text is a lot different from talking with them in person. So a lot of conversation questions just don’t quite work in a medium that begs for short responses. No long detailed stories. Nothing too deep or heavy. And forget anything too emotionally loaded unless you are an emoji master.
As single millennials, the “Should I text him first?” inevitably pops up in my friend group chats from time to time, followed by thorough deliberation. This time, I went straight to the source for the answers to what, if anything, is appealing about “the chase” when it comes to texting, what the game is about, and how to play. Five guys, ages 20 – 30, opened up about what goes through their minds before they hit send.
Work commitments can often make it difficult for men to find time to maintain friendships, but the first step to tackling male depression is to find people you can really connect with, face-to-face. That doesn’t mean simply trading jokes with a coworker or chatting about sports with the guy sitting next to you in a bar. It means finding someone you feel comfortable sharing your feelings with, someone who’ll listen to you without judging you, or telling you how you should think or feel.
The difference between a low in social standing woman like myself, is that I’m not looking for a wealthy man. I know for a fact that everything he is and does with every fiber of his being is to pave a way for me. Because My CREATOR made me from his rib, I am only half of a whole person without him for he is my ADAM and I’m his EVE. His military prowess, and power makes me week in the knees from masculinity . He’s tall between 6″1- 6″3, not sexy but handsome ,loving towards friends and family. When my future husband is around everyone will feel like they are in the presence of Royalty because is my King my life. There will be no need to go looking for attention when he’s not home because my Man is highly blessed in that department so I can hold out. Besides he’ll give me an allowance to make up for the time he is not there. All the while knowing I’m following my dreams and ambitions to provide a better living for the Earth and all species that dwell within it(is my destiny). My Love will be my strength, durability, and my backbone and I his ptsd medicine. Jhahod my love I’m waiting. From Nataya
Make sure he is not in a relationship. If he already has a girlfriend or boyfriend, it's best to be just friends. Put yourself in his shoes: Would you want another guy (or girl) to meddle in your relationship? Think about it; you would probably answer "no" to this question. Backing off is helpful to everyone: him, to yourself, and the person he’s dating. Plus, you'll find another guy eventually, so keep searching.
Despite what you may think or your past experience — you may never know just how much a man really does want to please you if he is able. In fact, the problems show up when he no longer thinks he can please you. Men are very simple creatures. They demonstrate their value by solving problems and fixing things (and occasionally they may make the mistake of trying to fix you).
If you want to use humor, Nerdlove suggests the safest route is to callback something from a previous interaction. For the cute guy from the gym, make a joke about the gym (or working out) since that’s how you met. You should be especially cautious, however, of using sarcasm in your texts. It rarely reads as well as it sounds in your head. If you really want to try, however, a study published in The Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology suggests that using some emoji, emoticons, or an ellipses can help. A text like “I can totally out-bench you ;-)” reads a lot better than the matter-of-factly “I can totally out-bench you.”

How To Make Your Boyfriend Love You Again


Sure, in an ideal world, a woman should be able to make her fortune and also have enough time to date, get married and have kids. Unfortunately, the problem is time. Getting rich takes a lot of time and it’s a myth that once you make enough money, you can just sit back and relax (actually the opposite). But with that said, this is not impossible but I do think it’s “harder” for a woman to become financially rich and THEN have kids (like when she’s 35-40) then the other way around. Mainly because by the time you become “rich”, you’re used to that lifestyle. To switch roles and suddenly be a stay at home mum and not worry about money anymore.. well does that happen when your source of income is solely on you?
The best way to keep a conversation going and get to know someone better is by asking questions. Start off with the basic questions: what kind of music are you into? What’s your favorite movie? As the convo continues, try diving into some more personal questions: what’s the most embarrassing moment in your life? How long was your last relationship? Why did it end? Keep the questions rolling!

This implies that if they went through a hard time financially, she’d be able to leave him with no guilt or remorse, but even if her beauty faded significantly after a given age, or any particular trait of hers that he loved her for decreased, he’d have no legitimate reason to leave, since those things could be considered “superficial” reasons to love someone, and that would work both ways.
An interesting article. I won’t go into details or start any arguing, but my first thought was what an idiot has written this article, especially the second half – the advices for women. The article made me laugh. Where does your experience come from? Some of the advices as I think are exactly the opposite of what the woman should do. When I tried to show interest at dating sites and asked men questions about their jobs – they just disappeared or avoided answering. If the woman goes away for 3 months as it was adviced to follow her goals or goes away to parties alone with friends all the times – I doubt any man, not only a rich man, will be happy with, when she returns back no wonder if she finds some substitute at her place. Wearing comfortable clothes as advised like jeans and trainers won’t attract anyone. If I wear that and I do, men just don’t turn their heads. But if some less atractive woman passes by in short skirt and high heels she is still looked at. One important thing was missed, rich men want only women under 30 or under 25, if you are older than that the chances are deminishing increasingly. It seems these advices saying that the woman should be independent to attract a man concern the middle class men which are well off. Would be more helpful if the article described how to find a man who is rich for good human qualities and good traits of character or the one who preserved these traits of character in spite of getting rich and wasn’t spoilt by wealth.
"This area is one of the most underrated erogenous zones. "The knees are full of nerve endings; that's why people are often ticklish there," says St. Claire. The backs of the knees are especially sensitive, since the nerves are close to the surface, she adds. For maximum sensual impact, swivel your tongue along the crease and then blow on the area. This puff of air will cause the moisture to evaporate, producing a thrilling hot-then-cold sensation. Plus, he'll be able to actually feel you breathing, which will tune his body in to yours and give your intimacy a surcharge.
Now's the time to make a joke about something you have in common, something in the news, or something funny going on in your life. You could say something as normal as, "omg, you'll never believe what happened to me today... I got up when my alarm went off (shocked emoji)". Ask him what's up with him, give him a funny challenge ("I bet you can't go the whole day tomorrow without laughing"), or send him a random, funny meme.
If there’s ever a way of knowing how to make a man fall in love with you and be a flirty tease at the same time, this is it. Men can’t resist a lingering woman’s touch. The next time you’re with him, be it clasping palms, hugging each other goodbye, or just crossing the street, let your touch linger softly for a moment longer than necessary. Your touch would be incredibly exciting for the man you like, and you’ll spark a romantic chemistry in no time. [Read: How to flirt with a guy]
The book mostly focus on Nora's struggle in keeping up with her social life, her swaps, her relationship with her family and her best friend, and her position in Adam's life. Romance, while is the driving force of the story, is basically a decent part of it although not exactly overtaking Nora's struggle. There is, of course, enough time to develop Nora and make her realize several things which is being yourself.

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“Remember that guys often will respond to a text with a one-word or two-word answer. These may include, ‘ok,’ ‘great’ or ‘hang on,’” Spira says. “Guys don’t really want to see a novel on their mobile phones, so keep it brief to keep him interested. Long-winded text messages appear like heavy drama to a guy, so don’t think he’s not interested if you suggest a place to meet and provide the address and he responds with, ‘too far’ or, ‘sounds good.’”

Now before you attack that idea as sexist, we're really just talking about two people who come together to love, care for and make each other's life even better by forming a cooperative partnership here. The real beauty of a relationship is when two people come together with a desire to give rather than just take. That's when the magic is unleashed.
And because many women feel more emotionally connected to a man after having sex with him, jumping between the sheets too early might make you feel like you’re into a guy more than you would be if you hadn’t slept together. In other words, sex can skew your feelings about a man. It can create a rosy glow that keeps you from seeing the flaws that ultimately mean you won’t end up together long.
Its not the end of the world. Ive seen amazing reconstruction surgeries that are beautiful-working from nothing, and turning out to look better than most womens natural breasts. My advice to you is to remember that your a survivor! And that life goes on. You can and will, do and be, complete and better…im not just saying that. Its a reality if u want it. let go of any heartache and take what you deserve for your life, be happy. Congrats to you! Your so strong!
If he’s not pursuing you, it’s time to stop pursuing him. Guys who are interested text back. Guys who aren’t don’t. Don’t bother trying to change his mind. You need to have the confidence to realize that if a guy doesn’t see how great you are, it’s his loss. Let go of him and move on to a guy who will be excited to have you in his life. You can’t fight for a guy who’s not fighting for you. At the end of the day, you just have to accept that no message is a message — that’s his way of telling you he’s just not interested.
You can’t make someone be your boyfriend, silly! This isn’t Harry Potter! This is where you have to be strong enough to see when something isn’t working. If you’re five dates in and you feel completely comfortable with the guy, the sex has been amazing, and you’ve sussed out that you share the same values – politely inform him that you would like to make this official because you think he’s bloody amazing. He’ll probably (hopefully!) reciprocate.
* Be where rich men are. We tend to end up with people who roam our environment. Pilots date stewardesses, cooks date waitresses, bartenders date everything that moves, doctors date nurses, and Facebook employees date Twitter nerds. The majority of men over 30 who work in banking, management consulting, high tech, big law, and venture capital are on the path to top tier wealth if they keep on saving and working for just one more decade. Attend charity events, volunteer programs, or opening night galas. Rich men love to network while supporting a cause. Lay on a beach at a five-star Hawaiian resort. All Hawaiian beaches are public. Take up traditionally expensive sports like golf and less so tennis which have private clubs. Go to alumni mixers with a friend who went to a prestigious university. There are at least 700,000 men in America (out of 1.4 million $380,000+ tax returns) out there after all.

Get A Guy To Like You


What can you say to somebody that won’t sound cheesy or an awkward, try-hard attempt to sound cool? Learn the 7 biggest mistakes most girls make when trying to keep up a text thread. (And how to avoid them). Try my long list of irresistible, witty texts. They’ll capture the imagination, stir curiosity and set the stage for a real connection. Use them TONIGHT. They’re all on P. 55-75.
Consider all the possible outcomes of dating your flatmate. If your dating relationship doesn’t work out, do you think you both could still continue being flatmates? Would living together be too much of a strain on a new dating relationship? If the age difference has you worried, consider how much age will truly impact your dating. Also consider how compatible you are together, your temperament, values, interests, and priorities. If these all seem to be a close match, then age shouldn’t matter so much.
3. Make dating a priority. Janis Spindel, the self-described "cupid in a Chanel suit" and president of the New York-based Janis Spindel Serious Matchmaking service, suggests that clients approach finding the right man as they would a job hunt. The key is to always be prepared because you never know when or where you'll meet someone. Wear clothes that make you feel attractive and plan ahead for interesting conversation. "You also need to change your routine," adds Spindel, who in the last 10 years has brought together more than 300 marriages and 400 monogamous couples. "Don't get your newspaper delivered. You might meet someone at the newsstand."

* I hope she still loves me if I had no money. Rich men understand they are attracting more women than normal for their wealth, but every rich man hopes his woman loves him for who he is as a person. Rich men don’t want to feel like chumps who have to pay for companionship. As soon as a rich man feels the only reason why a woman is asking a man out so he can pay for dinner and a show, it’s game over.

Well said and agreed! It’s all about common courtesy and the respect you have for a person. Unless you have a career that requires you to be without your phone, there is no excuse that you can go 24 hours plus without responding back to someone’s text message. The advice given to females is to not act needy, yet then we are given advice that makes excuses for guys not responding…sure, sure it is possible that a guy was just busy when you texted him, but more times than most a man will make time to respond to you. That response can be “hey, I’ll text you later, kinda busy right now,” or a response to continue the conversation but the point is people don’t just put people off that they are interested in, in fear that the person will lose interest in them.
Tip #4: Be easy to approach, hard to obtain. Although we're torn on whether playing hard to get is a good thing or not—for the record, Adam says that men DO want a challenge when it comes to winning you over—it's common sense that most men are terrified to make the move. So save the challenge for later, Adam advises: "Make it easy for them, open up your body, make eye contact and give them the clear signal that it's cool to break the ice. One the ice is broken, now you can tease him, test him and make him work for it...just the way he likes it."

They never call (probably because they're too intoxicated to remember they promised to). I don't see them all week, then the weekend parties roll around; they get a little Budweiser in them, become all excited when they see me, apologize, start feeding me lines, and we hook up again! I'm a good person! I deserve a nice guy. It's just really frustrating! —Stop Me Before I Do Something Stupid!
I moved to LA after two years in New York, where there are a plethora of guys my age. Unfortunately, though I did go on dates, nothing stuck. Now, I’ve moved across the country. There could be a guy, even a friend of a friend (the perfect set-up!), currently living in New York who would be happy to be my boyfriend, but I’ll never know. Frequently, on the street in New York, I’d walk by a guy I could picture myself dating, and I’d want to blurt out, “What bar will you be at on Saturday, and why weren’t you also at The Jane last Saturday night like I was?!” Which brings me to: