When it comes to knowing how to text a guy you like, it can be tricky. It sounds easier than talking to him face-to-face, but it’s actually not. You have more time to think of a reply, something funny and witty to grab his attention, but there’s always a chance for miscommunication when it comes to looking at a screen instead of someone’s face. See what I mean?
While making plans, be as direct as possible. During their focus groups, Ansari and Dr. Klinenberg also noticed a texting trend they dubbed the “secretary problem,” where potential couples would spend so much time trying to “pencil each other in” they would burn out and the spark would fizzle before the first meetup. We asked Vanessa Marin, licensed marriage and family therapist and Lifehacker contributor, how to avoid the “secretary problem,” and she said it’s all about being specific:
Texting has become a part of every day life, so much so that people rarely jump on the phone anymore—especially at the beginning of a relationship. But a lot can get lost in translation when you’re writing things out vs. talking in person and there are a lot of texting mistakes that are easy to make in the heat of the moment. Luckily, Project Everlasting author Mat Boggs has helpful insight into texting a guy to share with us. Check out his video to learn about the things you may be doing without knowing it.
Demonstrate your independence. Being clingy and dependent on someone else for your happiness are not attractive qualities. Instead, try to show him that you are an independent, strong woman. Showing him that you have a great life and that you don’t need someone else to be happy will intrigue him. Keep your plans with friends and family and turn him down for dates now and then so that he knows that you have your own life.
I think it totally depends on the type of person you are. Each individual has a different threshold of “hard to get” that they are willing to tolerate. When you’re texting someone that you like and they are hard to get, it’s nauseating, exciting, and thrilling, waiting for someone to respond – the fact that it’s new and unknown is exciting. The anticipation and re-reading of texts can drive you mad but it’s that pain and agony that makes it so much better when they respond.”
Gr 7-10–Much to her feminist mother's disapproval, “born-again normal person” Nora Fulbright has dropped the “smart girl” act that kept her “larval” in middle school and is dedicating her high school career to increasing her “popularity quotient.” She has exchanged gymnastics for varsity cheerleading, shed her chess-playing past, and dropped down from AP classes. Then chess-loving, brainiac, super-hot Adam Hood moves to town. Nora immediately goes to work masterminding a series of swaps to get closer to him, beginning with an agreement to go on a date with creepy, unpopular Mitch in exchange for a printout of Adam's class schedule. Not surprisingly, the swaps backfire, and Nora realizes that she failed to operate under the three principles of chess–foresight, caution, and circumspection. She goes into damage-control mode and manages to make good on all of her botched swaps. Although the resolution borders on being unrealistic, Valentine's tale will appeal to teen girls. In the same vein as E. Lockhart's The Disreputable History of Frankie Landau-Banks (Hyperion, 2008), the message of embracing who you are is one that teens need to hear.–Nicole Knott, Watertown High School, CTα(c) Copyright 2013. Library Journals LLC, a wholly owned subsidiary of Media Source, Inc. No redistribution permitted.