Chopstick couples do what each needs to do in a coordinated effort to get the job done, no fixed responsibilities that are the sole job of one person or the other. Sometimes it works out to leverage the strengths of one person over the other, like my husband will go get a needle and thread to fix my pants while baking bread and watching football… and I’ll be reading a PF article and picking ETFs, sitting next to him while doing the laundry. Things get done to both our benefit.
My dad is a ‘rich man’ and my mom a trophy wife. I love them both, but growing up I knew I never wanted to be my mom. She doesn’t have a lot of autonomy in their relationship. She has a beautiful life, but it’s always been subject to his approval. That said, now it would be hard to find a man who lives up to my dad, even though I wouldn’t want to be my mom, I still wouldn’t want to marry less than my dad.
Anyways, enough about my feelings, the point I’m making is that every message you send your man should be exciting. Now, I know this can be tough, especially if you have the kind of relationship where you communicate daily through texts, and share those little mundane thoughts and updates, but seriously, believe me when I say it’s time to stop. From here on out you want to make sure that every text message you send is captivating and exciting! I’ll touch more on this later.
I love your answer JustMe. I am a female and went on from being a nurse to getting my doctorate in nursing- DNP. Being any type of nurse certainly does not constitute being affiliated with being a hooker. It sounds like the original female surgeon poster is lonely and in pain from being hurt in her own relationships. She is clearly lashing out in a demeaning manner. I hope she finds what she is looking for…and as for a surgeon, I’m sure she knows she made a very ignorant, rude and generalized statement stemming from her own experiences.
This one is pretty self explanatory so simply put, it just means don’t over do it. If you blow up your man’s phone with pointless messages, then he isn’t going to look forward to hearing from you. However, if you only send him well thought out, cleverly crafted messages, well those are the ones that are going to keep him hanging off your every word…. Or text rather. ;)
When you follow this as outlined, it all adds up to something magical. When you embody a love of his Masculinity with your Appreciation for who he is, add in some Gratitude, a Nurturing spirit, an Easy-going nature, an ability to be Trustworthy, and honor his Independence all while captivating him — it all adds up to one thing. The final S is for Soulmate because that's what you'll have found.
I totally agree with Brooke. Here is the quote from this article that I find most sexist: ‘Orient your mind towards giving him what he likes, not on what you want to get from him’ . The implicit suggestion here is not to expect anything in return. So send him sexy photos, keep it light and fun to entertain and please him, but when it comes to giving the woman what she wants, i.e. to be heard, loved and respected, then that woman is labelled as ‘needy’. How very convenient for men! A good relationship is about give and take, and men would and should be expected to be respectful towards their women and respond to texts. I am not talking about obsessive and demanding texting, of which men are also guilty, but normal communication between two people who treat each other with love and respect. If a man is not responding to you, then he does not respect and does not appreciate you. You need to move on.
You can’t make someone be your boyfriend, silly! This isn’t Harry Potter! This is where you have to be strong enough to see when something isn’t working. If you’re five dates in and you feel completely comfortable with the guy, the sex has been amazing, and you’ve sussed out that you share the same values – politely inform him that you would like to make this official because you think he’s bloody amazing. He’ll probably (hopefully!) reciprocate.