First off I want to say thanks for your honest and refreshing post. It's rare and a wonderful thing for a guy to admit the challenges men face and try to act opposite of the gender stereotypes. I'm so sorry about your breakup and hope you find happiness and love. Please stay warm and loving and expressive. The right woman will appreciate it. I personally am the type who loves emotional expression in men.
Unfortunately, depression in men often gets overlooked as many of us find it difficult to talk about our feelings. Instead, we tend to focus on the physical symptoms that often accompany male depression, such as back pain, headaches, difficulty sleeping, or sexual problems. This can result in the underlying depression going untreated, which can have serious consequences. Men suffering from depression are four times more likely to commit suicide than women, so it’s vital for any man to seek help with depression before feelings of despair become feelings of suicide. Talk honestly with a friend, loved one, or doctor about what’s going on in your mind as well as your body. Once correctly diagnosed, there is plenty you can do to successfully treat and manage male depression and prevent it from coming back.
The way you were brought up, hugely influences how you’ll be as parents. This is why new parents look at each other and think, ‘Who the hell is this person?’. Staying together purely for the kid’s sake only works if you’re at least good friends. They’re better off seeing both of you happy separately than learning bad love habits from parents who clearly can’t stand each other.
Ever notice how much it bugs you when someone does not get back to your text right away? You need to know an answer to a question but they leave you hanging! Often the guy is oblivious to your need for a text but… sometimes he isn’t. Silence is also a form a communication. But you don’t get it! and you send a 2nd text back or a 3rd or maybe you just get on the phone and scream “I am needy!!!! Give me the freakin answer!!!!”

My dad is a ‘rich man’ and my mom a trophy wife. I love them both, but growing up I knew I never wanted to be my mom. She doesn’t have a lot of autonomy in their relationship. She has a beautiful life, but it’s always been subject to his approval. That said, now it would be hard to find a man who lives up to my dad, even though I wouldn’t want to be my mom, I still wouldn’t want to marry less than my dad.
So thats not the bargain you want. Fine. But thats the whole point. The women in question are not looking for you. What makes you think a financially well off person would not want a younger spouse and kids? Some certainly do. So its back to what you said; good communication, and knowing what you want. In this case, a wealthy guy who wants to be the breadwinner and provider. There is nothing wrong with that, just like there is nothing wrong with a woman that wants to have kids. Not adopt kids when she is too old to properly take care of them, but to have her own biological children when she is young enough to enjoy them.
Thanks for this insightful post... Yup, sure feels like a double or even triple bind. I'm supposed to be emotionally available, but also strong and brave and self reliant and have all the answers and be able to deal with everything fearlessly...and heaven help me if I express doubt, fear, anxiety, shame, what if I say "I feel from being orphaned in childhood I am unlovable and unloved.." Wow..that will get you stared at as a basket case, a damaged person...
Me and my bf are dating one and a half year now, he works in an investment bank and he is older than me 15 years. He is rich enough to buy few houses for investment but he never spend much money on me, we go out to dinner at normal places, we take public transportation even he does drive. He has tons of money spenting on his own but never share with me.
Well said and agreed! It’s all about common courtesy and the respect you have for a person. Unless you have a career that requires you to be without your phone, there is no excuse that you can go 24 hours plus without responding back to someone’s text message. The advice given to females is to not act needy, yet then we are given advice that makes excuses for guys not responding…sure, sure it is possible that a guy was just busy when you texted him, but more times than most a man will make time to respond to you. That response can be “hey, I’ll text you later, kinda busy right now,” or a response to continue the conversation but the point is people don’t just put people off that they are interested in, in fear that the person will lose interest in them.
4. Brag about him to your friends, your family, coworkers, and everyone at your weekly Al-Anon meetings. Tell the world that he’s a doctor prince who writes spoken word poetry. Remember that a lie is the truth with a positive life attitude. Grab strangers by their shirts and yell “I’m dating a successful man with a calm temperament who satisfies me sexually!” This will make his ego swell like an infected wound.

* Be an expert at something he is not. Singing, dancing, writing or playing a musical instrument are tops on the list of things most men don’t do well. If you can master just one art you will gain a tremendous amount of admiration. Tanya Streeter is a world record holder freediver who went down 525 feet and can hold her breath for 4 minutes. Now that is one sexy woman!
Starting right above his knee, plant a light-as-a-feather kiss there, then work your way up, increasing the pressure of your lips on his skin the farther you go. That's exactly what Lisa, 36, does to get her husband primed for super hot sex. "Women typically think men don't like foreplay, but my husband loves this," she says. "And sometimes I'll prolong the agony by starting over again down at his other knee. He goes crazy with anticipation."
Having a boyfriend or loving husband is a wonderful part of life – but so is being single and dating! Learn to enjoy your single life; it has benefits that marriage doesn’t. Being in a committed relationship is wonderful, and sometimes it’s even more wonderful to dream about it than actually work at it 🙂 So, let your dreams of finding a good boyfriend sweep you away. But always use your brains when you’re actually “interviewing” men for the role.

Interesting Texts To Send A Guy


The main reason that I don’t go after openly rich guys is because I believe that men who use their money in a flashy way are womanizers that attract their female-equivalents of whores and gold-diggers. I’m sorry for this negative stereotype of the dynamics of men/women, and I realize not all flashy men are bad, just like not every hooker or gold-digger is a bad person either, but I believe these extreme traits usually come from the less desirable characteristics of the opposite sex.
Men are all about the game of cat and mouse. They love to chase females and they love it when a woman leaves them on the edge of their seat wanting more. And for that reason, you need to be mysterious- even through text messages. If he asks you what you’re doing, don’t just tell him you’re bored alone at home. Maybe you could take an extra couple minutes to text him back and say, “Oh, sorry it’s taking me so long to text back right now! My hands are kind of full at the moment. I’ll text you in about an hour”. That makes him wonder- what is this girl up to?
Nora's smart BUT she wants to be popular. So when she moved schools, her plan: never admit to anyone that she's actually smart, dumb down her subjects from AP classes to regular ones, join the cheer squad, and date the hottest, most popular, and possibly one of the dumbest guy in school, Jake. But when Adam enters the equation, her plans changed OR has to change.
When you’re barraging a guy with a bunch of texts and he hasn’t answered you back yet, give him some space; give him some time to text you back. Texting should be kind of like ping-pong. You want your conversation with him to be interactive; you want it to go back and forth. When you start machine gun texting him, he doesn’t have time to text you back and it gets completely overwhelming and turns him off. Phew. All right.
Its not the end of the world. Ive seen amazing reconstruction surgeries that are beautiful-working from nothing, and turning out to look better than most womens natural breasts. My advice to you is to remember that your a survivor! And that life goes on. You can and will, do and be, complete and better…im not just saying that. Its a reality if u want it. let go of any heartache and take what you deserve for your life, be happy. Congrats to you! Your so strong!

Texts To Keep A Guy Interested


In fact, it may even prevent you from finding a boyfriend. You’ve heard the saying like attracts like? If you spend all your energy complaining about being single, you’re creating negative energy.  It’s like filling your body up with junk food. These junk thoughts impact what you attract. If you complain about being single, you’ll stay single. Or you’ll attract the wrong kind of guy simply because you don’t want to be alone.
Guys are looking for someone who will be loving and nurturing, and the best way to show him your mothering instincts is to express how much you care for others. Women who own a furry friend are seen as more suitable partners for long-term relationships because if you can take on the responsibility of owning a pet, you can pretty much take on anything!

Make Him Fall In Love With Me


So there you have it, 5 secrets for texting a guy you like. And to serve you in your love life, if you want to go deeper in this, we have written a texting guide for you. It is a fantastic e-book and it’s free! It’s a gift from me to you, I’ve posted a link right here in the description. You can go and click that link. Get that free texting guide. It will really serve you in your love life.

Get A Boyfriend


Some people can’t keep up with your bold spirit — but that’s their problem, not your's! Amazing opportunities come to you because you rarely back away from what you want, and your boldness will weed out any crushes who can’t commit to the adventure. Find someone who matches your fervor for life — or consider a shyer soul who will appreciate your take-charge attitude.
Does your man ever show affection to you? Does he say he loves you, or that you’re beautiful, or that he likes spending time with you, or anything even vaguely complimentary? If so, as soon as he does, reward him immediately. Figure out what he likes and provide it on the spot whenever he is nice to you. A nice cool beer, a biscuit, some sort of meat sandwich, a new PS4 game, whatever your budget and time allows for, make sure that whenever your fella behaves in a way that suggests he likes you, make him want to do it again and again by inducing pleasure every time it happens.
Seems like the process of you getting wealthy doesn’t appeal to you because it will take too much time (don’t want to be a workaholic mom who has no time to see her kids, totally agree, but); you want to only consider a man who has gone through this process and been successful, and then he is only useful for helping fulfill the life YOU want? I may be missing something, but that seems a little unreasonable….
Now when it comes to "getting" your man, there is one thing you must not do if you want a man to see a future with you. Do not treat him like some kind of project that needs to be fixed because it immediately brings up the walls. If you have the urge to try to change his clothes, his circle of friends, the way he talks, what he loves to do — don't do it!
Ben, 27, is our breath of fresh air. “I’m not one for games,” he says, “and the older I get, the less and less I play them. But I do think it is important to not come off as desperate or clingy when first meeting someone, because you don’t want to spook them.” When can you expect a non-strategized text from him? “After 2 – 3 dates, I usually stop worrying about the time or frequency of my texts as strategic, because I feel that I have a read on them and whether or not we like each other.”
I think it totally depends on the type of person you are. Each individual has a different threshold of “hard to get” that they are willing to tolerate. When you’re texting someone that you like and they are hard to get, it’s nauseating, exciting, and thrilling, waiting for someone to respond – the fact that it’s new and unknown is exciting. The anticipation and re-reading of texts can drive you mad but it’s that pain and agony that makes it so much better when they respond.”
If you’ve ever fallen hard for someone in the early stages of crushes and dating, you know the most frustrating — and the greatest — thing about it can be trying to gain their attention and earn their returned love. You want to prove yourself as someone worthy of their time and affection, but it’s never just as easy as casting a magic spell to make it all go well, is it?
You don’t like my opinion – no problem. There are plenty of sites that will pander to whatever you want to hear… regardless of whether or not its helpful or even damaging to your love life — they don’t care, they just want your clicks so they can sell ad space. I’m doing my best to help women get real results and escape the vortex of bad or harmful advice in magazines, tv shows, movies, books, etc.
Surely, it's okay no be insecure and feel the need to have a good reputation. Valentine was able to successfully pull off a good development for Nora. This is nothing but a cliche story, if you ask me. Nora is in desperate need to get everything she wants. She finds her self in so many 'swaps' because of trying to achieve her a goal which is to get as close as possible to Adam.

Girls are ALWAYS asking me what it means when he does not text back. Well it simply means that he is in control of the conversation whether he knows it or not. Just recently I sent a few texts to a friend and finally a phone call since I got no response back. I was a bit concerned that my buddy was upset with me so I stopped by his house. (granted this is a guy friend and multiple texting, calling is allowed) Standing in the front door was a grotesque elephant man like version of Bryce. His face was swollen like a boxer with a nose that looked more like it belonged on an alcoholic, punch drunk, elephant seal.

Get A Guy To Leave You Alone


That being said my husband was never until the last few years the primary breadwinner! Also, I can certainly say, w/ a great amount of thankfulness that he hated the horrific hours I worked! I hated his as well but I do believe the key is finding something (other than him referring to me as his “child bride” and his constant compliments that I’m his “arm candy”, I also find him devistatingly handsome!)
If you want to text a guy you like, send him a message bringing up something the two of you talked about or did together recently, or pick something totally random, like “If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?” Ask questions about his interests so you can get to know him better, and talk to him about the things you do on your own time. If he doesn’t respond much, he might be busy, so try not to overanalyze short messages or the time it takes for him to respond, and take a break from messaging him if he isn’t saying much.

I waited until I’ve read everyone’s comments and points of view and I both agree and disagree with the two. On the one hand here’s a woman whose fully equipped to take of herself. So why spoil and or give her the privileged life when she’s only here for some seasons and a reason. I completely understand due to the fact I experienced it personally. I took care of two guys in my life who used me and left me broke, homeless, and with a background to boot. Then comes to find out they get married to someone who provides stability since I wouldn’t. However, me being a woman myself, what woman don’t dream of being a princess out of some fairytale except those women who’ve accumulated their own, and vice versa.
Do what he asks you to do, without question – If a man asks you for a favor, and you question him and say “why”…he will instantly feel like you just don’t want to do it. If you have to ask him why, it sounds like you need him to CONVINCE you to do it.If he has to convince you to do things, do you really understand him?#2. Maintain yourself – Men are visual, which means if you let yourself go, he will lose interest. He doesn’t want to commit to a woman who is only going to get worse. Maintain yourself physically and health wise, to prove you are willing to be the best you can be for him.
If he is using pauses with you match him until you can ascertain whether or not it is intentional. If he pauses a day, YOU pause a day! Match his or her rhythm or better yet set the rhythm yourself. This can be done at anytime just make sure your pause is longer than his. This seems petty but!! It communicates very clearly who is in better control of their needs. This is not a game (well it is… but so is everything). It is more of a test that each of you put the other through. Imagine that your needing a text is just like them trying to kiss you and wont give up, not too attractive…
Guys aren’t the best at expressing their feelings. So when a guy isn’t texting back consistently, he’s trying to give you a clue. Sure, it would be nice if he had a little more respect for you and just told you openly that he’s not that into you, but alas, that seems to be asking too much. So a lot of guys do what they do best — avoid the problem and hope it will eventually go away when you get the hint.
Whether you’re texting or not, you never want to appear needy. This is a HUGE turn off for 99% of the male population and is a sure fire way to get him running in the opposite direction. So how can you not appear needy? Don’t respond seconds after he texts you. Give it a few minutes. Don’t say things like, “Oh my gosh I’ve been waiting hours for your text message” or “Thank god you texted me I missed you”. Instead, try saying something flirty and fun like “Well hello there 😉 glad to see a text from you”.
"The reason a woman gets hooked on one man is not because he is just sexy, or just playful, or just certain, or just masculine, or just bursting with integrity, but because he possesses a unique combination of traits: the man who is warm, has integrity, and can charm her family, then rips her clothes off in the bedroom and is a sexual god who's willing to invest all the time she needs in foreplay; the man who is respectful with her friends, can fix things around the house and in the garage like a pro, but knows how to enjoy a lazy Sunday at the museum or craft fair; the guy who is independent, kicks ass out in the world, but is gentle and loving with his woman and lavishes attention on her. Men like this cause an alarm to go off inside a woman's head and heart. He's just a character in a romance novel, she thinks. Be more realistic!"
When I justify an action by me being busy, it usually means, sorry dude I consider that the things that I am doing at work right to be of a higher priority and interest than you are. This was me being brutally honest. Now it doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t care for that person intimately on a superficial level…it just means that since they are not a long term investment for me or possibly because I am not at that stage of commitment…

Having a boyfriend or loving husband is a wonderful part of life – but so is being single and dating! Learn to enjoy your single life; it has benefits that marriage doesn’t. Being in a committed relationship is wonderful, and sometimes it’s even more wonderful to dream about it than actually work at it 🙂 So, let your dreams of finding a good boyfriend sweep you away. But always use your brains when you’re actually “interviewing” men for the role.


I don’t know how I have never read your advice columns before, but these have made me feel like I know more than ever before. So I have been talking to this guy that I met online in January. We have not met yet because I was away at school and only just got home. He initiated the relationship and used to be incredibly attentive to me. He would text me, sext me, call me…it was great. All of a sudden he says we are moving too fast and now he rarely texts me at all. He doesn’t answer my texts some times and it makes me crazy because he claims to want to talk to me more and meet me but I don’t know what to think. Please help.
When you spend down the principle ( the original amount we saved), you don’t have money to be free. What being a millionaire means is that I can purchase organic foods instead of regular foods and when I go to the grocery store I don’t have to choose. I have a budget but it is a reasonable one and can purchase any food item I want with in that budget. But shopping for nice clothes is still out of the question.
Look someone in the eye 75 percent of the time and you may be able to trick his brain. Why? The brain remembers the last time someone looked at him like that and it remembers that feelings of love were in the air. That triggers a release of phenylethylamine (PEA), a chemical cousin to amphetamines secreted by the nervous system when we first fall in love. It’s also what makes our palms sweat, our tummies flip over and our hearts race.
Have a life. Desperate, dramatic, and clingy relationships are often rooted in a feeling of need and desperation for a man to fill your life. Even if you have low self-esteem, work over time to build it. Pursue your goals and be focused, explore your passions, have an interesting life, do things that take you outside your boundaries. Don't put up a tough exterior to get over shyness; gradually learn to build trust with a network of people, so that your boyfriend isn't the only person you open up to and share your life with. Also remember to trust yourself first. If you can't trust yourself, you are likely to not trust your man.
Be yourself. If you're not, then how else would you know if he likes you for who you are? If you are pretending to be someone you are not, you will feel uncomfortable every time you are around him and that is the last thing you would like to happen. If you are uncomfortable around him, it would probably be hard to talk to him and if you can't talk to him, it will be hard to keep a relationship.

2. Make him a snack after sex. Men love sex and men love snacks! That’s right, immediately after sex, dash to the kitchen. You read that right, goddess! Once he’s pulled out, combat roll out of bed and haul ass to snackburg. It has to be a gourmet snack — bacon wrapped scallops with cream sauce and roasted Brussels sprouts with a side of chicken fingers will do in a pinch.
You just haven't met the right person yet! When you meet someone who makes you light up, you'll know. Until then, there's no point in stressing out. You might be a little shy around strangers, but it’s worth making an effort to meet new people (and get to know the people you already know a little bit better). Don't worry if it takes a little time. The best things in life are worth waiting for!
Lead by example to help him improve. Don’t criticize him harshly when he does something bad or wrong. This will make him feel horrible and he will begin to feel bad when he is around you. Instead, if he does something you don’t like, lead by example to show him a better way to be. You can certainly tell him when you don’t like something he does, but don’t be mean or controlling about it and help him find a good way to change.
Sometimes we search too far to get a boyfriend, we don’t realize if the closest person could be someone who can be the best boyfriend for us. I started the relationship with my spouse from a solid friendship. At that time I didn’t realize if he’s the one. I was too busy to find a boyfriend at other places. Till one day I realize if he is the best one, and thanks God he has the same feeling with me 🙂
Some people are clearly better than others at this. I have two sets of friends — one couple is married with children, and another couple will soon be married — who have met through me. I don't try to set anyone up, I just enjoy going out with all of my friends. So, I work hard to merge my college friends with my work friends with my high school friends.

I met a guy on a dating website. We went on a date which I thought, went really well. But he didn’t try to kiss me or anything, but said he’d like to see me again. We have been texting multiple times a day, and he has called me a few times. But the conversations feel like those in a friendship, and he has made no attempt to set a date to meet again. I proposed 2 dates, but he had family commitments on both, and now he is away on business for a week. It feels like very mixed signals from him. How do I know if he likes me?
I like the happy face but that is probably because I was beaten into cuteness living in Japan so long. I am embarrassed to say I had to resist sticking a poke’mon head over the gear shifter of my car last week. The above examples look similar but each communicates something slightly different. Maybe you don’t think this will be picked up by the guy but I promise you it will be subconsciously. What do these communicate? The first example is a bit cold but it leaves more to the imagination which can be fun depending on his response. The happy face and lol are both softeners and leave the reader with a feeling that they just got nudged in the ribs with a smile. (^_-)-☆ do not underestimate how small signals can get your point across!
Hi Eric! About man’s texting habits, when you’re in a relationship and the guy, being busy, responds to texts but doesn’t actually initiate contact for a couple of days or so, can it mean he doesn’t care that much about our relationship? I mean, from your perspective, don’t the guys feel the need to check in if we’re OK, or is that a sign that they don’t even think about us?

He and me are best friends. I love him. But I don’t know whether he loves me or not. I know I’m the only girl with whom he shares everything. And the way he’s with me.. he’s never with anyone..We both are like lovers but not actually commited. We don’t share any physical relation but spritual & emotional.. I want to be with him till my life ends. How can I get him feel the same..
Yes, I think these are all important. I found the guy who values all of this, including my uniqueness, which he let’s me know very often. It took me a while, but he is there next to me right now (we’ve been together for over a year). We recently had a talk about out past ‘not so working relationships’. I was saying how guys would leave me after 1 or 2 weeks and he said: “I think those guys were expecting you to be sb you were not, whereas for me you seemed to be sb else and when I got to know you, you turned out to be exactly how I wanted you to be.” And this is ladies what you should be looking for, nothing less. A guy who genuinely wants to get to know you. That one is really interested.

Perhaps these "practical" dating strategies feel like extra help to some of us. We don't want to acknowledge that we need outside assistance to meet someone. I'm not sure what to think of practical methods. It could be really helpful, but I can't seem to shake that "extra math help" feeling. Besides, if my dating skills are like my math skills, no amount of extra help could get me afloat.

How To Get A Virgo Guy To Like You


well i like this guy but some days hes saying stuff like i love you and being nice and playful and those days where he is just quiet. his friend who is a girl helps me to find more about him and he only has ever had 1 girlfriend and he hasn't dated anyone since they broke up which was last year. The girl who is talking to him for me (btw she is only mentioning me in conversations to see what he says she is not asking him out for me..thats weak.) she said that one of her other friends had a crush on him and he said he isn't into her and is not wanting to be in a relationship and this was a while ago not far. But its so hard to tell because she also said that when this guy talks to girls, but not like that she says that to the girl it feels like he likes her to but hes only being friendly. i'm losing hope and i have no idea if we can ever be a thing. i think he is only being friendly but thinking back of all the things he said to me i think he is kind of interested i guess.


Help him feel special. One way to charm a guy is by treating him in a manner that makes him feel like he's special to you. When you're talking to him in a group of his pals, pay special attention to him. Make steady eye contact and ask him specific questions. Go out of your way to speak to him when you can and show a strong interest in his life, from his hobbies and his career to his family and friendships.

How Can I Make A Guy Like Me

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