I started my career when an editor approached me about writing an irreverent sex advice column. I thought, “Awesome! Send me your cutest employees and I’ll get started!” We syndicated the column all over the country and I sort of became known as the “East Coast Dan Savage.” I then went on to write my first book, Men Are Pigs But We Love Bacon (Kensington).


I love your answer JustMe. I am a female and went on from being a nurse to getting my doctorate in nursing- DNP. Being any type of nurse certainly does not constitute being affiliated with being a hooker. It sounds like the original female surgeon poster is lonely and in pain from being hurt in her own relationships. She is clearly lashing out in a demeaning manner. I hope she finds what she is looking for…and as for a surgeon, I’m sure she knows she made a very ignorant, rude and generalized statement stemming from her own experiences.
I humbly offer a different perspective. At 65, I am at a different age spectrum of many of your commenters. I have an FI that meets my needs now and heading into the future. A few years ago I suddenly lost my beloved husband of nearly 30 years. The struggle and searching journey proceeding from that massive loss has transformed much of my worldview. Chris and I shared an epic love. We started out with very little but a shared passionate attachment. But we held similar ethical standards, a commitment to hard work, the willingness to work in therapy when we derailed, love of parenting and so much more. We embraced joy and general silliness whenever possible. We put our love first…always.
To all those rich men out there… Just so you know… The next time u go to your local grocery store, cvs, bank any of those there are girls like me who would love a simple hello and thank you.. . I live pay check to pay check.. No successful relationships and two beautiful little boys. Im ambitious I wish I can go to school everyday.. But my children need me I’m with someone but it seems it may not last.. He doesn’t work near as much as I do although he does help me with my kids… He acts like he is rich tho.. Constantly messing with my image.. Telling me I’m not skinny enough.. I work 40+ hrs sometimes and take care of all household work while he pretty much sleeps all day. He always tells me I’m a mess up.. Any way.. That’s was more of a rant.. I hear stories of women who treat men who try to do everything for them all the time of the women being horrid and horrible.. My main goal in life is to become a pediatric rn, I want to work with children or the mentally ill.. I want to help people.. I would love to be able to walk out of my house knowing the guy in with can handle the house hold.. Cook mabye clean even.. Idc about money… I don’t care about how much u have I care about love.. All that is just extra.. I mean don’t get me wrong not having to worry about not having money at all it must feel great.. I’m the type that would still worry tho.. I would still want to go to work.. Or go to school get degrees for what I love to do.. Join an organization I would feel free knowing that if I wanted to volunteer I would be able to and I wouldn’t have to worry about not getting my pay check cut and having no money… I look at these women who seem to not have a clue as to how lucky they are to have someone by they’re side ready to help u.. I can’t ask for help from my partner he can’t help me.. He is tired of “helping” with my kids.. All I have is one day…. So the next time u see someone working at ur local stores send a good vibe for me… Do a good deed.. Never judge a book by the cover!

You need a bit of luck to find someone good, but you can make your own luck. That simply means putting yourself in situations where you meet new people. It could be a party, an after-school club, a new hobby, the gym, a charity event, a speed-dating event or even a website. You don't have to hold up a sign saying 'I'm single'. Just be approachable and friendly and who knows what might happen. You could work on your chatting-up skills too.
Yes, I think these are all important. I found the guy who values all of this, including my uniqueness, which he let’s me know very often. It took me a while, but he is there next to me right now (we’ve been together for over a year). We recently had a talk about out past ‘not so working relationships’. I was saying how guys would leave me after 1 or 2 weeks and he said: “I think those guys were expecting you to be sb you were not, whereas for me you seemed to be sb else and when I got to know you, you turned out to be exactly how I wanted you to be.” And this is ladies what you should be looking for, nothing less. A guy who genuinely wants to get to know you. That one is really interested.
One way to make a man fall in love with you is to talk to him about your similar interests, like movies, music, or sports. Don’t be afraid to reveal any talents you have that make you special. When you’re around him, be kind and affectionate, and avoid being clingy or dependent. The more positive you are when you’re around him, the more likely he will be drawn to you. For more advice from our reviewer, like how to use clothes and body language to make a man fall in love with you, read on!

The smartest way to find a good boyfriend is to start with yourself. Get emotionally, spiritually, and physically healthy by looking inward (and upward!) first. You don’t need a man, but your life may be happier with a partner. You don’t have to be in a relationship to be filled with purpose and joy, but your experiences will be deeper and richer if you have someone to share them with.


You also need to up your cardio. Fat tissue encourages your body to convert testosterone to oestrogen. Burning blubber helps reconfigure your hormones, so food turns into muscle not ‘moobs’. But the most potent weapon in the war on chest-based embarrassment is heavy metal. Lifting weights ups testosterone levels, which helps rebalance your hormones.
Practice the Golden Rule. If you want him to do something, you should be equally willing to do it yourself. You want him to ask you out or take you out or do whatever else for you? You should be equally willing, and don't wait for or expect him to do it first. Good men respect a person who applies the same rules to themself that they would apply to a man.
Consider all the possible outcomes of dating your flatmate. If your dating relationship doesn’t work out, do you think you both could still continue being flatmates? Would living together be too much of a strain on a new dating relationship? If the age difference has you worried, consider how much age will truly impact your dating. Also consider how compatible you are together, your temperament, values, interests, and priorities. If these all seem to be a close match, then age shouldn’t matter so much.

What To Text A Man You Like


Please understand that it doesn’t take a rich man/woman to be rich, happy, and content. What it takes is loyalty, honesty, trust, most of all communication and the willingness to compromise.Someone who you can share your deepest secrets without fear of how it may seems or sound because he/she truly understands everything and anything about you . Knowing that you have someone who will piss you off before you go to bed but wake you up happy just because he/she are next to you . 

#1 Be yourself. This is the most important thing to do. Just be yourself. When behind a screen sometimes you show the person who you think you can be as a way to impress them. But don’t do it. When they see you in person, they see a completely different person, so what’s the point? Just be yourself when texting him. [Read: 14 steps to take to love being you]
Look your best. That doesn't mean changing yourself to impress another person. Take pride into your appearance to give yourself an aura of confidence that can be highly attractive to someone you want to attract. Make a point to always be well-groomed and clean, from your hair to your teeth. Dress and accessorize to accentuate your finest feature, whether it's your hair or your height.
Just because men don't fish for flattery (when was the last time you heard a guy ask, "Honey, do my pecs look small in this shirt?") doesn't mean they don't love ego stroking. "More than anything, men desire the feeling of being desired," says Bernstein. "When a man hears praise from his partner, it reinforces that she's attracted to him, which further intensifies his feelings for her."

It is true that time is the most valuable thing. I’ve worked straight through the end of my college years plus another 8 to get where I am. I find myself working non stop and feeling out of place if I take more than a day off or sit around for a few hours just because I feel tired. Pretty much most women I’ve dated spend most of the relationship complaining that I work to much. They just don’t understand that I got where I am by making good use of my time and I do not want to get lazy and possibly lose everything that I built up.
Seriously? The odds of that happening are about as unlikely as me ending up sitting between three crying babies on my redeye home to Philadelphia for Thanksgiving. (Logically it should almost never happen but believe me, it can). This logistic is why I struggle with the iconic rom-com Serendipity. Sara had it made. She was in the same department of the same Bloomingdale’s at the same time as Jonathan. But, no! She had to throw it away just to prove a point. And she still gets him in the end? Smh. Luckily, in 2017, we have dating apps to control exactly what Sara was too optimistic to appreciate. We can plan to meet at a specific place. Then we can hope we’re not getting cat-fished. Which brings me to:
Timing is everything. If any of the four above logistics are in jeopardy, i.e. he’s moving to another city, he decides he can no longer look at my shiny forehead, or I cannot cope with how slow of a walker he is, then there is a chance we will not want to be in a relationship with each other. Beyond that, some guys just aren’t looking for relationships. Maybe he just got out of a three-year relationship with a girl who cheated on him, maybe he is focused on his career, or maybe he is afraid of settling down. Talk about #FOMO again. Or, even worse, maybe he is already in a relationship! With another man! Who knows!
I don't know whether I like this guy or not and one of my friend also have crush on him but he doesn't like this girl and he alsof told me notrim to friend with her.Whenever he sees me he tried to smile at me and of course I also smile back at him and sometimes he really feel so shyam that his face turned very red and he looks really cute.Everyday I text with him but not everyday whenever I have free time.

* Take care of yourself. Because rich men have more selection, they tend to gravitate towards better looking, fitter women. The one thing every person can do is work on their fitness – facial features not so much. There’s a big fear from men that once he marries his woman that she will chop off all her hair and let herself go. Don’t let your man fear such a thing by eating healthy and maintaining a workout regime that’s beyond his own. When a woman asks a rich man to see whether he’d like to join her at the gym, deep down the rich man is beaming with joy.


Please understand that it doesn’t take a rich man/woman to be rich, happy, and content. What it takes is loyalty, honesty, trust, most of all communication and the willingness to compromise.Someone who you can share your deepest secrets without fear of how it may seems or sound because he/she truly understands everything and anything about you . Knowing that you have someone who will piss you off before you go to bed but wake you up happy just because he/she are next to you .
According to Love Signals: A Practical Field Guide to the Body Language of Courtship, we naturally blink faster when we are emotionally excited. Bat those eyelashes to let him know you’re interested without saying a word. People also, “lean toward whatever – or whomever – they find most important at the time,” according to Love Signals. Use this trick and slightly lean towards him, whether it’s in your chair in class, or while standing at the bar.
Ask interesting questions. “How are you?” isn’t interesting. “Tell me five things about you, four of them true” is. Be interesting. You also need to know what to do if the texting goes drier than a popcorn fart. For that you need fun, conversational starters (icebreakers). I’m going to show you a list of zany icebreakers that’ll totally get his attention.
Another trick to make someone like you over text is to stroke their ego. Let them know they’ve made a positive impact on you and that they’re still on your mind. An example of this would be: “I just saw the cutest little squirrel in the park gathering nuts and it made me think of you!” A text like this is going to make the other person feel special — and making someone feel good is a surefire way to get them to like you.
Flirting is absolutely one hundred percent important when it comes to talking- or texting- the guy you’re after. And yes, it’s totally possible to send flirty text messages. Try and say things like, “You looked so hot during football practice today” or maybe “I’m just laying around in bed, wishing you were here with me”. There’s SO many ways to flirt over a text message, and you should do it as often as you see fit. You could even teasingly flirt with him over a text message by saying something like, “Umm…I hate to break it to you but I TOTALLY saw that wicked fall in gym class. Hehe, clutz!” Again, don’t go overboard as this may make you appear desperate and maybe even easy- and that’s definitely something you want to avoid.

Texts To Make Him Smile


A guy in my church was madly interested in me, but the church members in my congregation fiercely oppose to him dating me. To them he should choose another who are their friend. He no longer in my congregation, but, he is still interested. The church members lied about me, spread a bunch of lies. He’s good friend with them, but i don’t communicate with him. I called and texted him once, he hasn’t replied back. I occasionally see him. When he sees me i can tell that his world lights up. I believe i love this guy too very much. Everywhere i go i carry him in my spirit. Can i tell him how i feel about him? I want to move on. What do you suggest??? 

Wow…. ;) So what does it say if both my wife and I were both dirt poor when we first met? At the end of the day, money is money but we appreciate our time together and building wealth together. On a side note, your post reminds me of Eddie Murphy, back in the day, as he was always talking about wanting a woman who would want to be with him because of him and not his money.
Look, receiving a text like this, even if you received a text like this, this is like someone holding up a bear trap, and saying, “Hey come here, you. Yeah, you. Come here. Put your face in there.” You’d be like NO, I am not putting my face in there. No, I am not calling you now, until you calm down. So, the best thing to do if you’re upset with him and you want to talk to him is to not send him a text fight threatening him, telling him to call you now.
Guys aren’t the best at expressing their feelings. So when a guy isn’t texting back consistently, he’s trying to give you a clue. Sure, it would be nice if he had a little more respect for you and just told you openly that he’s not that into you, but alas, that seems to be asking too much. So a lot of guys do what they do best — avoid the problem and hope it will eventually go away when you get the hint.
My daughter is a pretty young lawyer from a middle class family and is married to a handsome young, rich doctor from a wealthy family. All things being equal, what seemed to charm him the most was that, although she had dated many men over the years, she had only been intimate with one man before him. He was actually quite sexually active before he met my daughter(which is why she insisted on std testing before they were intimate!). Anyway, I guess what I’m getting at is that even though she is beautiful, fit, smart, and has many of the other attributes mentioned in the article; I think what made her stand out above the rest to him was that she had respect for herself and in turn, he valued her highly and wanted her to be his wife and the mother to his children.
if all the women you "know" are into bad boys. Women who go for bad boys are psychologically damaged and think they deserve a man who treats them poorly. Or they're immature. I used to be attracted to jerks when I was in my teens and early twenties for the reasons stated above. Now I'm with a sensitive guy and I wouldn't trade him for any of those so called "bad boys."
* Women who know what they want are most attractive. Nothing turns a rich man on like a strong woman who is successful in her career or business. The woman who goes for glory piques the most interest. Rich men constantly search for those who they can find their equal or superior. She doesn’t have to be rich. Instead, she can be superbly talented in something that he is not e.g. musical instrument, language, singing, dance, art, etc.
Science has shown that when looking for their perfect mate, guys tend to go for the girl who fills a void that's missing in their life. People naturally gravitate to those who are similar to them, but when it comes to dating, people are also looking for someone who can create a balance. If your guy is suffering from low self-esteem, become the confident and bubbly person he wishes he can be. He will subconsciously feel attracted to you, because you are everything he wants to be!
Ben, 27, wants a more creative conversation starter. “If you are actively pursuing someone, you better come up with something better than ‘hey’ or you will lose their interest,” he cautions. But don’t underestimate the guy’s ability to play hard to get: “However, if I know someone is interested in me, and maybe I’m playing hard to get, just saying ‘hey’ after a lull in conversation can let them know that I’m still interested, but still give me the control.”
Like when I'm in my regular clothes like he stares at me alot and and I kind of think he likes me but when I'm in my school uniform he doesn't pay any attention to me and he doesn't bother to talk to me or get to know me but then when I asked him out he was like I don't know yet but I feel like if you really did like me he would come and talk to me to know me so we can get to know each other he talks more to the other girls and he talks to me it's like having to get to know each other if we can talk and then I'm going as soon as I'm starting the conversation and it's like he doesn't real want to talk to me in the longest conversation we've ever had is it was about like five minutes and then it just got really crazy and his first girlfriend knew that I liked it and then I tried to be friends with his girlfriend to get closer to him but that didn't seem to work but I don't want to really be a man stealer I want him to want me and I don't want to be his third where I want to be his number one so now I'm like crossed up and I don't even know what to do anymore I just stop talking to him in trying to get closer to him and he just left me alone and I left him alone and it was like that's that but I still really like him then I don't know what to do.
Seriously? The odds of that happening are about as unlikely as me ending up sitting between three crying babies on my redeye home to Philadelphia for Thanksgiving. (Logically it should almost never happen but believe me, it can). This logistic is why I struggle with the iconic rom-com Serendipity. Sara had it made. She was in the same department of the same Bloomingdale’s at the same time as Jonathan. But, no! She had to throw it away just to prove a point. And she still gets him in the end? Smh. Luckily, in 2017, we have dating apps to control exactly what Sara was too optimistic to appreciate. We can plan to meet at a specific place. Then we can hope we’re not getting cat-fished. Which brings me to:

If you want to text a guy you like, send him a message bringing up something the two of you talked about or did together recently, or pick something totally random, like “If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?” Ask questions about his interests so you can get to know him better, and talk to him about the things you do on your own time. If he doesn’t respond much, he might be busy, so try not to overanalyze short messages or the time it takes for him to respond, and take a break from messaging him if he isn’t saying much.


Um. I think this article is very interesting. I obviously for one couldn’t help clicking and reading it. But I do disagree with many of these points. In that I feel like the expectations that money can attract quality women is off. I think money, like any other advantage in life (eg. if you were born extra good looking or extra charming or extra intelligent) is an attractive quality and it certainly helps your chances, but if you have really absurdly high standards for your partner you will end up alone.


Now before you attack that idea as sexist, we're really just talking about two people who come together to love, care for and make each other's life even better by forming a cooperative partnership here. The real beauty of a relationship is when two people come together with a desire to give rather than just take. That's when the magic is unleashed.

I Want Him To Ask Me Out


I want say something for those who say about us ( ladies wanting rich guy) so many bad things….I’m separated after 12 years of marriage, few other relationships but I have many friends with opinion like mine. Why I want rich guy ? Because I finished with ‘sponsoring’ partner/s when I do my best, work hard night and days (financial specialist within government organisation) to pay bills, golf or horse lessons for my daughter, drive nice car, live in nice home with seeing basic stuff aren’t done by my partner at home, move out means me literally liftin heavy boxes, promises aren’t keep and the only what is done is work ( employment). I’m tired and just want strong, independent guy who will be real partner to share life with. I don’t want weak pu*** who put everything on my shoulders, I’m not materialistic, empty lady but I’m not gonna be in relationship any longer with someone who only take!

I have disagree with you. I think that we often make too many excuses for men, saying how differently wired they are, when really, all humans are the same. If a woman/man wants a woman/man, rest assured that he/she will not lose an opportunity to communicate with her/him. Now if we take an extreme case where the woman/man is really busy at work…at the worse point she/he would reply saying that they can’t chat now but will reach out later during the day. I truly believe that a real grown up relationship should work that way…otherwise the woman/man is definitely not that into the other person.


Finding true love isn’t as difficult or painful as you might think – even if you’ve recently been through a difficult breakup or painful divorce. Trust that you can find a good boyfriend and move forward in peace and joy. Know that even though you may be struggling now, you can and will be happy one day! And the good news is it all starts with you.
An interesting article. I won’t go into details or start any arguing, but my first thought was what an idiot has written this article, especially the second half – the advices for women. The article made me laugh. Where does your experience come from? Some of the advices as I think are exactly the opposite of what the woman should do. When I tried to show interest at dating sites and asked men questions about their jobs – they just disappeared or avoided answering. If the woman goes away for 3 months as it was adviced to follow her goals or goes away to parties alone with friends all the times – I doubt any man, not only a rich man, will be happy with, when she returns back no wonder if she finds some substitute at her place. Wearing comfortable clothes as advised like jeans and trainers won’t attract anyone. If I wear that and I do, men just don’t turn their heads. But if some less atractive woman passes by in short skirt and high heels she is still looked at. One important thing was missed, rich men want only women under 30 or under 25, if you are older than that the chances are deminishing increasingly. It seems these advices saying that the woman should be independent to attract a man concern the middle class men which are well off. Would be more helpful if the article described how to find a man who is rich for good human qualities and good traits of character or the one who preserved these traits of character in spite of getting rich and wasn’t spoilt by wealth.
I'll preface this by saying the few dating/relationship books I've flipped through or read descriptions for often come across as very condescending to women. This is especially true if meant to unveil the "male mind" and give it to us straight - the "ugly truth" type of stuff. They make women feel bad for being women. You come away from just one little paragraph feeling like men essentially don't like women (beyond the physical). We're told we need to be more feminine, but also think like men, less clingy, but not too independent - etc. Here is a book which focuses less on how women need to change their nature, needs, desires, etc, as if we're hopelessly incompatible with men by nature, and instead it focuses on social skills & positive thinking modes for attracting & developing relationships with compatible men we actually like & who are worth OUR time & energy.
Tip #3: The Vibrant Vibe. According to Adam, the law of attraction is that like attracts like. By this he means if you want to attract fun and exciting guys, you've got to be fun and exciting yourself. He says, "if you have the stink face' look all night and appear miserable, guess who you'll be attracting? You guessed it, the creepers." Ugh, we all know the ones right? The ones who are all, "I bet I could make you smile, girl." Ew. On the other hand, if you're enjoying yourself, you're more likely to attract great guys. According to Adam, "women who get approached by quality guys always have the vibe that projects I'm loving my night regardless!'" On a non-guy-related note, having fun is always superior to not having fun.
Surely, it's okay no be insecure and feel the need to have a good reputation. Valentine was able to successfully pull off a good development for Nora. This is nothing but a cliche story, if you ask me. Nora is in desperate need to get everything she wants. She finds her self in so many 'swaps' because of trying to achieve her a goal which is to get as close as possible to Adam.
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