Help him feel special. One way to charm a guy is by treating him in a manner that makes him feel like he's special to you. When you're talking to him in a group of his pals, pay special attention to him. Make steady eye contact and ask him specific questions. Go out of your way to speak to him when you can and show a strong interest in his life, from his hobbies and his career to his family and friendships.

How To Make Any Man Want You


Roleplay. The same banter techniques that work in meeting and attracting someone in person also work great over text. Initiate a scenario in which you’re already a couple in some capacity: a husband and wife headed toward divorce, a rock star and a groupie, a pair of buddy cops on the case — anything else you can think of. Bantering through made-up roleplay is great; it provides a playful way to create a shared experience that makes the other person smile and feel more connected to you by sharing what your collaborative imaginations can come up with. Examples of how to get the roleplay rolling: “Green Sparrow, I’ve got the target in my sights! Should I take the shot? Over!” or “I’m in the lab inventing a new ice cream flavor. What should I bring us home for dessert, dear?”

Most rich men are fairly loyal family men. They are the breadwinners at the later part of life, but they often meet their significant other before they are wealthy, and sometimes the wife needs to support them in the beginning. I have never noticed that wealthier men are likely to be scoundrels. And many of the wealthier men I know, hang around with poorer friends they have known all their life. I don’t really think I agree with this article exactly, except that a lot of them are worry warts, and a lot of them are cheapskates. But then, if you love someone, you protect them, thats how all men are. I think if you asked a wealthy man if they wanted a wife that was independently wealthy, they would say; yes, but I also think they would be lying. They like the control being the one with the money gives them, even if that control is largely imaginary.

How To Get A Guy To Talk To You Again


Not all are women are “Gold Diggers” lol. I divorced and was raising my five children, working 3 jobs, preparing two meals/daily and running a business, so that we would have much extra and I would not accept child support for necessities/desires. I then met my second husband after a year of courting, he asked me to marry him and allow him to take care of me and my children. We married and even though I knew that I did not have to continue working, to maintain my lifestyle, I kept working and running my business. He begged me to at least let go of two jobs, telling me that I worked too much and I should hire a housekeeper because he was tired of watching me take care of everyone and not have adequate time for myself. He told me that I was the first woman that loved him for him. He passed away in 2012. He was a fabulous man, so classy, smart, strong, honest, loving, fun, etc. I should have cloned him lol. My good friend told me that I was in trouble if something were to happen to him, she was right…No one has compared to him since. It is not just about money either.
* Why should I ever settle down? Rich men have a larger selection of women thanks to women being more accepting of rich men. You will see 4s go out with 8s all the time and nobody ever bats an eye because it’s so common in places such as New York City and San Francisco. Given a rich man’s mental conditioning, he will logically assume he is more handsome, more charismatic, and funnier than he really is. It really doesn’t matter if he’s not because he continues to get outsized attention from the ladies.
* If only I had someone to share my money with. There will come a time in every rich man’s life when he’ll realize the pointlessness of making more money if there’s nobody to spend it on or with. He may accumulate so much that he won’t mind being a sugar daddy to someone who doesn’t fit any of his criteria for the ideal woman so long as she enjoys his company. He would rather be with someone than be alone.
#25. Disagree without disappointment – There will be differences, BUT the main issue is how you HANDLE the differences between each other.If you handle disagreements by arguing and becoming disappointed when you don’t take his side, you are showing him that you are emotionally immature. But, if you disagree without feeling disappointed, you show him that you can respect his opinion, even if you don’t think its right for you.
Similarity, in terms of personality, doesn’t necessarily mean you have to be mirror images of each other (in fact that might get a little boring). The important thing here is being open to each other’s interests.  If he likes hockey, watch a game with him at least once or twice. If he’s a country music guy, and you can’t get enough hip-hop, well, at least you can both appreciate a strong love for music.
After her death, I had many divorcees looking to ‘help me out’. I did need help as I have 3 younger kids. One woman who was a friend of my wife and is very attractive was over all the time. Well, we did end up dating. It ended after a few months. She was 49, very attractive, twice divorced, and broke. I mean broke like couldn’t pay her rent broke. I discovered from other women who know her that her showing up at my door after my wife’s death was not an accident. She began borrowing money from me. Larger and larger amounts. She talked marriage (say what? My wife, your friend, just died six months ago) She said she wanted a $10K diamond ring if we got engaged. She wanted to buy a very large, expensive house together. She liked borrowing my Audi.

My Advice: Go out of the environment you would typically find yourself in, strip yourself of everything that shows you are financially secure, i don’t mean look poor, but have a natural and modest look. Go for charity walks, Go to places where you’ll meet people doing things for a positive cause, mix up, take interest and enjoy the activities and just be you. Hopefully the right man will come along.

Texting A Boy You Like


This guy does the same thng. In the beginning he would txt but now very rarely. I usually would send tons of txts. One day i sent a sexy pic and he responded “i like that” and that was all. Well yesterday no txts. But at 9pm he txt and ask if i was mad at him. I said no ofcourse not. He told me to txt him at 9am this morning. I did but no response. Havnt txt him back yet. I think some guys do just want u to chase them to see how good they have u wrapped around their finger. But i learn fast. He is probably getting worried now bcuz two days in a row i held my ground. When he txt later i wont respond. He just pkaying games. Men do that. But he gonna be chasing me bcuz im going to give him the cold shoulder even tho i miss him terribly. If a guy really likes u and he see u are changing he will get scared and fix his attitude
if all the women you "know" are into bad boys. Women who go for bad boys are psychologically damaged and think they deserve a man who treats them poorly. Or they're immature. I used to be attracted to jerks when I was in my teens and early twenties for the reasons stated above. Now I'm with a sensitive guy and I wouldn't trade him for any of those so called "bad boys."
An occasional smiley face is one thing, but making a picture story out of emojis is just a little bit excessive. As a rule of thumb, if you think you’re overdoing it, you probably are. Boys aren’t usually as expressive as girls, and, “OMG cool!!!!!!” may seem like enthusiasm to you, but can come off as crazy to guys. Just keep it casual and use emoticons sparingly.

How To Charm A Man And Keep Him


Get to know each other. Get to know who he is as a person. This will tell you if he is someone that you really want to get emotionally invested in. You don’t have to like everything about him, but you do have to be accepting of your differences. You can’t change some things, especially not at the beginning of a relationship, so it’s important to like him as he is.
Natalia This is the story of my life that i am still pondering upon even as i write this article.I maybe judged and i may not be but even if i am judged, no one can ever know my real personality or family.I have been asking myself if i should let the world know about this or maybe i should just keep it to myself cos most people might think am crazy.All the same am telling my story. my husband has four kids and we have a happy family.It wasn’t always just like that.Before my husband, i have been married to five different men.Yeah five, all five marriages failed after six months not cos we had problems or the relationships was on the rock they just come and go without good reason.It was easy to say i was cured by someone or something.I had a feeling there was something about me that wasn’t just appealing in the site of all the men that claimed to love me to death.The entire puzzle of my life just seem to fall into place when i met my present husband i fall hardly in love with him like he also did.It was all in his eye that he loved me with all he’s got.Yeah we got married but just after the first six months as always he just wanted out as every other man that i was married to.I never really wanted to let go of any of my ex husband i was willing to fight for the marriage but they bluntly weren’t ready for that.But this, i just got tired of same old same old thing just wanted a steady marriage with the love of my life.I tried marriage counseling with him which is suppose to me the best way to resolving marital problem but he was like its been tattooed in his mind that he wanted out of our marriage.I WANT TO LEAVE A QUESTION FOR ANYONE READING THIS CAN A WOMAN REALLY BE HAPPY OR FEEL COMPETE WHEN EVERY OF HER MARRIAGE FAILS.CAN A WOMAN EVER FEEL LIKE THEY BELONG IN THE SOCIETY WHEN EVERY MAN SHE IS MARRIED TO REJECT HER AFTER A SHORT PERIOD OF TIME WITHOUT ANY COURSE?FOR ME MY ANSWER IS A NO COS I KNOW HOW HARD IT WAS FOR ME AND
Do what he asks you to do, without question – If a man asks you for a favor, and you question him and say “why”…he will instantly feel like you just don’t want to do it. If you have to ask him why, it sounds like you need him to CONVINCE you to do it.If he has to convince you to do things, do you really understand him?#2. Maintain yourself – Men are visual, which means if you let yourself go, he will lose interest. He doesn’t want to commit to a woman who is only going to get worse. Maintain yourself physically and health wise, to prove you are willing to be the best you can be for him.

Been there, done that. I don’t honestly know if you can ever be 100% sure if a woman loves you for you unless you pretend to be “poor”. I clicked on this article for the same reason you did. Gold digging woman are disgusting trash. I have done “social experiments” on them. Like pulling up to a coffee stand in an old beat up car and asking a woman on a date. It is amazing the difference in treatment you get when you pull up in an expensive sports car. Yes almost all of them are gold diggers. I had a poor girlfriend who I helped tremendously. Paid her medical bills, took care of her vehicle needs, nice vacations. She let her true feelings out telling me that I was a “piece of garbage selfish A$$hole” when I wouldn’t pay off her student loans and send her to alcohol rehab. Not that I couldn’t afford it, but I hate being treated like an ATM machine. I have these problems and I am only 35 years old, an average 5’9″ tall, good looking and well built from working out all of my life. I have come to the conclusion that woman don’t actually love a man, they love what they perceive they can gain from him, or what he can do for her. Then you have to get a prenup and everything else. That is why so many men, moneyed or not are going MGTOW. I hate to tell you, but you will never be able to buy this woman’s happiness with money, she will bleed you dry. That is the kind of woman that I had, and I was much happier when I sent her down the road. I know the kind of closeness and love you are talking about wanting from a woman, but this one, unless she has an epiphany, will never give it to you. I have friends with old fashioned foreign wives that love them through thick and thin, truly for better or worse, for richer or poorer I have seen it with my own eyes, it does exist. You may have to start over. Good luck and God bless. As for me, time to hide the wealth again and find a down to earth farm girl.
Take a good look at yourself. Psychological studies have shown that people seek out partners to fill a psychological void. Sometimes these voids are unhealthy; for example a woman who is unhealthy will actually seek out any man for the "high of seduction" or to get attention and feel desirable. Look inside yourself and ask yourself why you want a man so badly, be truly honest with yourself, and, if need be, talk to a therapist about this. Someone with issues only attracts a guy with issues as well, and a good, real man doesn't want anything to do with someone who has more issues than TIME magazine. If you want a good, healthy relationship with a real man, make certain that your own mental state and intentions are healthy.
You have a serious problem if he is too shy to talk with you. How will you ever communicate about all the important issues you are likely to face in a long-term relationship? I'm not sure what kind of a relationship you're in or how long you've been together, but if you can't convince him to trust you enough to open up and communicate with you, I genuinely believe you'd be better off with someone else. And I suspect he'd be happier if he waits until he finds a partner better suited to him. Either someone who is happy and comfortable with the silence or someone who has the unique qualities he needs to allow him to feel comfortable enough to be open and communicative.

You don’t like my opinion – no problem. There are plenty of sites that will pander to whatever you want to hear… regardless of whether or not its helpful or even damaging to your love life — they don’t care, they just want your clicks so they can sell ad space. I’m doing my best to help women get real results and escape the vortex of bad or harmful advice in magazines, tv shows, movies, books, etc.
Girls are ALWAYS asking me what it means when he does not text back. Well it simply means that he is in control of the conversation whether he knows it or not. Just recently I sent a few texts to a friend and finally a phone call since I got no response back. I was a bit concerned that my buddy was upset with me so I stopped by his house. (granted this is a guy friend and multiple texting, calling is allowed) Standing in the front door was a grotesque elephant man like version of Bryce. His face was swollen like a boxer with a nose that looked more like it belonged on an alcoholic, punch drunk, elephant seal.

Get A Guy To Leave You Alone


Finally, Date someone smart. He’s got to challenge you but he can’t be a teacher! If a man that challenges you,makes you wonder and adores you! (Money can be made!)… SO STOP LOOKING FOR A SUPER WEALTHY SPOUSE! JUST GET OUT THAT ELBOW GREASE AND MAKE YOUR OWN DAMN MONEY! I GUARANTEE YOU YOU WILL SUDDENLY GO FROM BEING SIMPLY A PRETTY FACE TO ONE HELL OF A CATCH (no matter the man or his age OR career!).
Showcase your independence through what you say. That's another quality that can be fascinating to men. No one wants to be around a clingy and needy woman. To draw a guy to you, convey to him that you are an independent being with her own goals, dreams, hobbies, friends, values and ideas. Do not be afraid to voice your opinion. Make him feel like there is a reason to want to get to know you further.

2. Make him a snack after sex. Men love sex and men love snacks! That’s right, immediately after sex, dash to the kitchen. You read that right, goddess! Once he’s pulled out, combat roll out of bed and haul ass to snackburg. It has to be a gourmet snack — bacon wrapped scallops with cream sauce and roasted Brussels sprouts with a side of chicken fingers will do in a pinch. 

You have a serious problem if he is too shy to talk with you. How will you ever communicate about all the important issues you are likely to face in a long-term relationship? I'm not sure what kind of a relationship you're in or how long you've been together, but if you can't convince him to trust you enough to open up and communicate with you, I genuinely believe you'd be better off with someone else. And I suspect he'd be happier if he waits until he finds a partner better suited to him. Either someone who is happy and comfortable with the silence or someone who has the unique qualities he needs to allow him to feel comfortable enough to be open and communicative.
I like that this post gets it out of the way. Love and all that other stuff is good and all that for DATING, but for marriage? Money now enters the picture when it didn’t matter so much before. Especially if the woman wants kids. I think a lot of you guys are completely forgetting that fact. Only women can have kids, so if a woman wants to be rich (or at least have enough money to never worry about money again) and have kids (and actually be there for them), what is she meant to do?
A man who really likes you will be happy to hear from you. He’ll also be more than happy to text back. He won’t see texting as something he has to do but something he actually wants to do. He’s interested in you and that’s why he wants to keep the relationship flowing. If he doesn’t bother sending a reply, he’s already stopped that flow and the “relationship” is headed straight to nowhere.
You can't expect to get it right first time, so going on dates is a good way to test people out. Most of us go through our share of dull hotties, exciting weirdos, nasty charmers and kind ogres in the quest for true romance. Either that or it's a long barren spell. Experimenting with different types of people is good, even if only to make us realise what we don't want.
Amy North, BA, BSc, is a woman’s best friend. If you’re searching for the man of your dreams, or you want make your boyfriend stay devoted to you, then Amy North is your gal! Amy's incredibly popular YouTube channel, which boasts over 340,000 subscribers and 20+ million views, helps women learn how to get what they want out of their relationships. Her best-selling program, The Devotion System, reveals a number of psychological ‘hot buttons’ that make any man 'tick', and teaches readers how to use simple techniques and phrases to make any man love you.
Good news is, this bit is the easiest by far – just combine the three points above. Be out and about. See a guy. Assess him. Listen to him. Analyse him. Look at him. Let him look at you. Read his expression. At this point, you should be fluent in “smizing” and be able to gather whether he thinks you’re hot stuff or not. What happens next is really up to you, but the most important thing is either to be confident enough to go over and say hi, or to make it incredibly obvious with your body language that you would like him to come to you. Weirdly, and against expectation, often the former is the less embarrassing, because the latter can lead to some disastrously cringe head-beckoning gestures.
Thanks for this article..I’m.confused :-/ and I’m would love some advice from military perspective. For me I had a really good chemistry with this person. Everything was good….until he was informed about deployment. He told me he doesn’t do well with long distance relationship. I told him I understood his decision since I had that experience and didn’t blame him. But! The problem is that he’s the ONE ?and I told.him I loved him with all my heart. He questioned this expression because we’ve met for only 3 wks already in person, and about 1 month via text. I feel I scared him away :( that was not my intention. He told me he would think about what he wanted to do with our relationship. He left for a trip for 2 wks so I send him a message wishing him to have fun & to wishing he would come back safe. I didn’t hear back from him. A wk prior to sending him this last text I had send him a “good morning text” and I received a zero response :-/….HELP!

"The reason a woman gets hooked on one man is not because he is just sexy, or just playful, or just certain, or just masculine, or just bursting with integrity, but because he possesses a unique combination of traits: the man who is warm, has integrity, and can charm her family, then rips her clothes off in the bedroom and is a sexual god who's willing to invest all the time she needs in foreplay; the man who is respectful with her friends, can fix things around the house and in the garage like a pro, but knows how to enjoy a lazy Sunday at the museum or craft fair; the guy who is independent, kicks ass out in the world, but is gentle and loving with his woman and lavishes attention on her. Men like this cause an alarm to go off inside a woman's head and heart. He's just a character in a romance novel, she thinks. Be more realistic!"


I remember that embarrassing "extra help" stigma in high school math. There were the smart people who were able to comprehend the lecture, do the homework, and memorize equations. Then there were the mental circus freaks, like me, who couldn't grasp the concepts, memorize the formulas, or do the homework. When the teacher suggested we get extra help, we bristled.

Your comment was awesome. I’ve been single for a long time and would like to settle down. I’ve focused my career goals to a point where I’m comfortable with my life accomplishments, I continue to re-invent myself for purposes of self satisfaction as well as attracted interest for my suitor. I consider myself a woman of substance and look forward to the day when I can be appreciated fully by the man I love. Right now I’m resting in the fact that this day will come soon.

Make Him Want You Over Text


Hi Eric, I’m in no relationship right now. I’m on a dating site and matched well with a as we messaged, he stated, we have a lot in common. He asked to start texting so we did. In two weeks we sent pic’s of ourselves and had phone sex twice. He keeps saying we need to meet, when we set a day and time he was getting sick. Fine, I believe him. You suggested a sexy pic. Good idea. It’s fun, but is there a way to ask him if he still wants to get to know me? And, What is the standard of getting to know one another if the dating sites are where I’m meeting guys. I understand he and other guys are tired from work and are busy on days off and talking to other women on the site. Thank you for your time, Kim
I have read many of the comments here. I am a psychology major, who dares to dream. I went through a divorce that ended due to my ex husband cheating multiple times. I have helped many throughout my healing process when it comes to relationship advise. Money is material. It can be replaced. But your soul mate, the one you are destined to be with is irreplaceable. Your soul mate is your best friend, the one who listens to you, cares for you when you well and sick, the one you can laugh with, create memories, the one who will hold you, take time out of their day to cherish you, adore you, love you for you, not your title, or how much you make, the one who completes you mentally, physically, and spiritually. I am a single woman that knows what I want, and will not settle for anything less. I have been through many challenges in life, but through my challenges, have discovered who I am, how I can help others, and grow. I was married for eight long years, as I settled for what I thought I deserved and stayed in an unhealthy relationship. Since 2010 (the year I left that behind), I was able to complete a degree in psychology with a very high GPA, have a current 4.0, in the honors society, and have received over thirty thousand dollars. I am currently pursuing a degree in nursing. Even through I am in some school debt, I have allowed nothing to stand in my way of success. FEAR is a huge factor, even in relationships. I dare to dream, so I challenge each of you to find who you are before you find your mate, know what you want, and never settle for less. Remember life can be fun, full of endless memories, challenges come with it as well, and who you have standing next to you will help you discover your dreams and challenges and help you accomplish them if you have your soul mate. Money will come with time, it can be replaced, but again your soul mate cannot. Your soul mate needs to complete you! Money itself cannot complete you! (Just some food for thought) 

“As far as rules on when to return a text, don’t sit and bite your fingers counting the hours to pretend you’re not available,” Spira says. “If you hear from him and have your phone handy, respond in a reasonable time. This means within a few minutes to one hour. A study from online dating sites ChristianMingle.com and JDate showed that a reasonable response time is one hour or one to three hours. Anything after that sends a message that you’re really not that interested.”


I met a guy on a dating website. We went on a date which I thought, went really well. But he didn’t try to kiss me or anything, but said he’d like to see me again. We have been texting multiple times a day, and he has called me a few times. But the conversations feel like those in a friendship, and he has made no attempt to set a date to meet again. I proposed 2 dates, but he had family commitments on both, and now he is away on business for a week. It feels like very mixed signals from him. How do I know if he likes me?
Show him what makes you special. Letting a guy see what makes you such a catch is another great way to increase his affection for you. It will intrigue him and make him want to get to know you even better. For example, if you are skilled at playing an instrument, look for an opportunity to play in front of him. Or, if you are an excellent baker, whip up some cookies and share some with him.[8]

The Rules Of Texting (Explained By Guys) is cataloged in 20 Something, 20 Somethings, 30 Somethings, College, Health & Wellness, Heart Catalog, Inspirational, Love, Love & Dating, Love & Relationships, Love & Romance, Love & Sex, Love and Relationships, Quote Catalog, Relationships, Relationships & Dating, Romance, Texting, Womens Lifestyle, Writing & Expression
You would think that with the proliferation of dating apps, it would be easier to find The One. Or at least, The One I Can Settle Down With. But after a year of swiping on Tinder, Bumble, Bite, Coffee Meets Bagel and going on dates, I’ve realised I’m no closer to getting into any sort of relationship. Hookups? Oh yeah, these apps will definitely connect you to the nearest available D faster than you can order McD’s. But getting a boyfriend? Like Charlotte, I’m exhausted. Where is he?
If you want to text a guy you like, send him a message bringing up something the two of you talked about or did together recently, or pick something totally random, like “If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?” Ask questions about his interests so you can get to know him better, and talk to him about the things you do on your own time. If he doesn’t respond much, he might be busy, so try not to overanalyze short messages or the time it takes for him to respond, and take a break from messaging him if he isn’t saying much.
This isn’t a staring contest. In fact, according to research, looking away and then briefly glancing back a few times is another signal that lets a guy know you want him to approach. (Ashley Fox explains the process really well here.) You don’t have to overthink it or be weird about it. When you see a cute guy and wish he would come say hi, make eye contact with him, smile, look back at the person you were talking to, and then glance back at him. Repeat one or two times. If you are worried it will be creepy, don’t. When we interviewed guys on how they know a woman likes them, Charles said, “Things like [when] eye contact is made and then avoided and then made again.”
Now before you attack that idea as sexist, we're really just talking about two people who come together to love, care for and make each other's life even better by forming a cooperative partnership here. The real beauty of a relationship is when two people come together with a desire to give rather than just take. That's when the magic is unleashed.

I Want Him To Ask Me Out


I’ve been going out with a guy for about three months now. He always tells me he really likes me, he’s very jealous and buys me flowers everytime he sees me. However, he has a tendency to “disappear”. By this I mean he will switch off his phone and go a whole day without talking to me and then say he was a bit busy. Recently he’s started to ignore my messages too .. What does this mean ?? What should I do ??
I see a partnership as 2 people making a go of some common goal. My father used the utensil analogy of couples who are a fork and knife, versus couples who are a pair of chopsticks. The differing expectations for yourself and for your SO means you need a fork/knife relationship. The job gets done, and each person has their role which is fixed by gender norms, or however you two decide.

Make Him Want Me


It is not so much that the procurement of a wealthy partner is a problem as such I have found. The problem as an educated, above average, fit, woman of means myself is that when once I was able to procure a partner with means he proved to be unworthy and incompatible in other ways. By that I mean he struggled badly with the demons of alcoholism which was just terribly heartbreaking for me as a potential spouse. Moreover, as his fiancée, due to his sheer addiction (some would coin this textbook late stage alcoholism due to denial) it became an absolute deal breaker. /injects>
Seriously? The odds of that happening are about as unlikely as me ending up sitting between three crying babies on my redeye home to Philadelphia for Thanksgiving. (Logically it should almost never happen but believe me, it can). This logistic is why I struggle with the iconic rom-com Serendipity. Sara had it made. She was in the same department of the same Bloomingdale’s at the same time as Jonathan. But, no! She had to throw it away just to prove a point. And she still gets him in the end? Smh. Luckily, in 2017, we have dating apps to control exactly what Sara was too optimistic to appreciate. We can plan to meet at a specific place. Then we can hope we’re not getting cat-fished. Which brings me to:
there is this guy that i like and hes a twin. i really like him a lot. everyone tells me that it looks like he likes me but when we talk about it he says that hes still not over his ex. he compliments me in every way possible but this girl told me that he said he only liked me as a friend and that it looked like his brother was the one that liked me. what can i do to find out if he likes me even if hes still not over his ex. And what can i do to make him like me? thanks for reading
The main reason that I don’t go after openly rich guys is because I believe that men who use their money in a flashy way are womanizers that attract their female-equivalents of whores and gold-diggers. I’m sorry for this negative stereotype of the dynamics of men/women, and I realize not all flashy men are bad, just like not every hooker or gold-digger is a bad person either, but I believe these extreme traits usually come from the less desirable characteristics of the opposite sex.

I have a question. It’s similar but with a few different factors. I’ve been dating this guy for 7 months now, and we’re currently in a long distance relationship. We were dating and in the same place for 2 months, and now we’ve been long distance for almost 6 months. I’ve seen him once in this long distance time, and I’ll be seeing him again in two weeks. He’s from South Africa, but he currently works at a school in the Middle East, where I was working. A lot of my friends stayed there too, so I know many of his friends and coworkers. We really fell in love and he suggested we stay together and do the long distance thing. And he’s paying for me to come to his brothers wedding in two weeks in South Africa. He’s been planning for our future for next year, where we’re looking for schools to work at in a different country. When we’re together, everything’s great, and he’s kind and sensitive and attentive. But when we’re apart, I sometimes feel like he forgets about me. When we part initially, he’s very attentive with messages and texts and skypes and letters. He’ll say things like “you are my everything” and “I miss you” And will want to know when we’re skyping next. But after a while, especially with this longer separation (4 months), he just got really busy, and then I felt left behind. At least a text or two in the day but nothing major, no more fluffy stuff really– that only very occasionally. He likes me to send him sexts and pics and will ask for them, but sometimes he doesn’t even reply to those! We’ve had a few arguments about it because I don’t understand why he can’t find the time to send little messages anymore or even respond to the messages I send. He seems to be fine with this kind of a relationship, but since we never see each other, I want to talk more, but it makes me seem needy and makes him pull away if I bring it up. What do I do wrong? Why did he get all distant? is he trying to imply that he’s over it and doesn’t want me to come on this trip? But he sends me emails about jobs for next year, but he forgets to text “I love you.” I don’t understand! And how do I then adjust my texting style?


Follow the Golden Rule. That means apply the same rules to yourself that you'd apply to others, including him. Real men do in fact notice this; they just don't scream it out. For example, if he tells you he has a girlfriend and things are not working out, Stop! and think ladies and gentlemen that this could be a "test" on how you would handle the situation, so stand your ground and cut off communication (hint: "Golden Rule"). Don't go on about how you "don't NEED no man!" or about "men this, men that" if you don't want him treating you the same way. DO, on the other hand, treat him--and others--with respect, dignity, and honor. Others will notice, too, and who knows--if they know you want a good, real man but don't yet have one, they just might introduce you to one!
They never call (probably because they're too intoxicated to remember they promised to). I don't see them all week, then the weekend parties roll around; they get a little Budweiser in them, become all excited when they see me, apologize, start feeding me lines, and we hook up again! I'm a good person! I deserve a nice guy. It's just really frustrating! —Stop Me Before I Do Something Stupid!
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