I’m not saying I came here with no slightest bit of motive..but, the more I read all things above the more I realize, how ridiculous all of ‘that’..if I only have one penny in my pocket, I’ll give it willingly to anyone who need it more than me..u can say I’m naive , stupid, etc..but that’s the way I live..we are’nt the same. We live for to be happy, even u have a million dollars on your bank but u never content with that, u will never gonna be happy, we have our way to face this life..so, if u wanna be happy then be..don’t thinks unnecessary things
Psychology 101 may not be the first place you normally go for dating advice. Here’s a secret though—you can use some of what you learn in class towards your advantage on the guy scene. There are reasons you fall for certain people (besides their cuteness), and once you understand the rules of attraction, you’ll be the master of making guys fall for you.
Guys who are actually interested will make time for you. Everyone’s busy AF, but if a guy actually cares, he’ll do whatever it takes to be in your life. That means he won’t leave you hanging on a text. He’ll text back because he actually wants to talk to you. Seeing your name light up his phone will make him happy, not annoyed, and he’ll be more than happy to shoot over a few words to keep the conversation going.
What you say in your first text message is important (more on that later), but it isn’t nearly as important as you actually reaching out. Don’t be afraid of the initial text message. As online dating coach Patrick King explains, they’ve already given you their number because there is some mutual attraction there, so you don’t have to stress as much about the possibility of rejection. When you do send that first text, however, Regina Lynn, the author of The Sexual Revolution 2.0, suggests you follow the same etiquette as phone calls. Don’t text him at odd hours, like late at night or really early in the morning. Texting the cute guy from the gym when he’s trying to sleep will turn that “yay she’s texting me!” moment into “why is that girl waking me up?” Not a great first impression.
Sam-you hit the nail on the head again. After divorce at 35, took 7 years to find wife no 2. It’s virtually impossible to find a woman who fits requirements. Virtually all wanted kids and for me to look after them or had kids and wanted me to look after them. Finally found producer partner, not parasite partner. Im now the weak link on mortgage application. This eliminates the opportunistic behavior from women married to rich men and gives both people in the marriage complete freedom. If we got divorced, neither of our lifestyles would change. She doesnt need a penny from me and I dont need a penny from her.

Okay, now, I’m not saying you need to talk about the way molecules function (unless of course you two are into that kind of thing). But you should AT LEAST be able to hold a bit of an intelligent conversation from time to time. For instance: if he starts talking about something from history (that’s well known), don’t play the dumb card. Let him know you know what he’s talking about. Now, if you really DON’T know what he’s saying, then feel free to say a comment such as “Wow, that’s really interesting. I’d love to hear more about that!” That shows him that even if you’re not aware of some things, you’re eager to learn. And men love that.
To stoke your guy's interest, trail a yummy waiter with your gaze or flash a flirty smile at one of his friends when you know he's watching you. And it never hurts to make an extra bit of effort with your appearance when you know you'll be in a situation where other men will admire you. Just the possibility of other guys eyeing you all night will definitely make him appreciate that he's the lucky dog who gets to take you home.
I am a woman, and I come from a well off family. I have always worked hard and dated men not based on income or looks but what I thought was love. My first relationship was fully abusive (he beat me because he wanted to control me and could not handle any men looking at me) I left, of course. My next long term started ok, but he would make me feel like garbage, tell me mutual friends didn’t like me (which wasn’t true, he just wanted to control me), he told me my businesses would fail, etc, Im an idiot and stayed with him 7 years…. the last 3 years he was financially dependent, but Im loyal and kept hoping he would get it together. 2 years after we broke up he told me he didn’t know what to do with his life now that he didn’t have my money…. :( And my latest relationship is in a similar financial bracket as I, but it took him 5 years to ask me to marry him and only after I left him twice and cried because I couldn’t believe that I was once again in a relationship that was going no where. And for the record, I am quite attractive, fit, work out 1-2 hours a day, make a reasonable living and don’t depend on my partners for money. I have low self esteem when it comes to my personal life, but high when it comes to my work. I am good at what I do. I keep hoping that I will find love and be able to have children, but I think my time for that is getting tight… So it goes both ways I guess. There are male gold diggers out there. And men need to stop leading us on if they have no thoughts of marriage. Its not fair to women. Most of us want kids and marriage and love. I’m honestly really tired of it all, and I find that this latest set back has brought be to a really dark place where I feel like I have nothing left to look forward to. Money and making money is fine but if you aren’t in love and don’t have love…. what’s it all worth? Friendships are hard to maintain, everyone I know works hard and long hours, as do I. If you don’t have family, you don’t really have anything to build towards. At least for me. I know some people are really happy without.
Love is the key to a good life, with riches or without true love from the heart creates riches because two to three minds are better than one. Death and loneliness comes to all but true Love covers all. Love makes lasting and real friendships which are not based on things but people and keeps the friends or family. Things including riches are to be shared with family, children who have no one in this world to take them to school, to provide food and clothing, teach them how to be rich and help others too, elderly and lonely too. when rich and poor die. they can take no riches or poverty with them. A rich heart makes riches becomes happy when sharing, knowledge, ideas, money and many more. I am rich in sharing all I can with those who do not have.
I’m so confused. I’ve been dating a guy once a week for about 3 weeks. He usually texts all throughout the day, happy things, stuff that upsets him about his job, asks me how my day is, etc. Initiation is probably about 60/40 me, or relatively equal. When we go out, it’s amazing. Like I’ve found some one who really really gets me. And he’s said the same. He says things like, “your gorgeous”, “you’re wonderful,” ” I want to see you many more times”, etc. I was vey happy with the way things were progressing. He’s a very introverted person, who suffers from depression and migraines, so I know he has “off” days. I try to give him space, and was really excited when he invited me over to his house to watch a movie. A lot of our texting had become pretty sexual at this point, so I was pretty sure that would happen. And it did. Once at night, and again in the AM. We chatted a bit and then I hit the road. When I said goodbye he flashed me a really weird look, but I tried to ignore my gut. After all, we’d had sex like 10 minutes earlier, and after we did, he took me out back to show me the boat he’s building, his pride and joy. Later that day (5 hrs later?) I texted him a funny reference to the movie we watched the previous night, and got no response. So around 930 that night, maybe 12 hours after I last say him, I texted to say “I’ve noticed you haven’t been responding like you usually do, is everything ok?” Thinking maybe he had a migraine, or was depressed and might want to talk about it (as he has done before). It’s now been 24 hours since I sent that text, and there’s been dead silence on his end. I don’t understand. I’m not going to text him, at least for a week, to make sure I’m not bothering him. But I’m a mess. I’m really worried that I did something wrong, or worse, that I was used for sex. Which really would be surprising, since he was really emotionally vulnerable with me prior to that night/ morning. Even after we first had sex. It’s as if something went wrong in the 15 mins between getting out of bed and into my car. Do I just give up and move on? It seems like either 1) he’s dead 2) his phone is broken, (clearly both are highly unlikely) or 3) he was really good at pretending to be vulnerable and open, with the end goal of having sex and kicking me to the curb. I totally feel used, and that is a terrible feeling. The fact he ignored me when I was checking in (in a lighthearted manner) to make sure he was ok is sooooo not “his normal”…but it’s currently his reality apparently.
Well said and agreed! It’s all about common courtesy and the respect you have for a person. Unless you have a career that requires you to be without your phone, there is no excuse that you can go 24 hours plus without responding back to someone’s text message. The advice given to females is to not act needy, yet then we are given advice that makes excuses for guys not responding…sure, sure it is possible that a guy was just busy when you texted him, but more times than most a man will make time to respond to you. That response can be “hey, I’ll text you later, kinda busy right now,” or a response to continue the conversation but the point is people don’t just put people off that they are interested in, in fear that the person will lose interest in them.
Make fun of yourself. A surefire way to get someone to smile over text is to make fun of yourself in a tongue-in-cheek kind of way. By making fun of yourself, you get them laughing and show that it’s okay for them to let their guard down. They’ll feel more comfortable with you, which will allow them to become more attracted to you. Examples: “I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not too sure.” or “Take my advice — I’m not using it!”
That being said my husband was never until the last few years the primary breadwinner! Also, I can certainly say, w/ a great amount of thankfulness that he hated the horrific hours I worked! I hated his as well but I do believe the key is finding something (other than him referring to me as his “child bride” and his constant compliments that I’m his “arm candy”, I also find him devistatingly handsome!)

"This area is one of the most underrated erogenous zones. "The knees are full of nerve endings; that's why people are often ticklish there," says St. Claire. The backs of the knees are especially sensitive, since the nerves are close to the surface, she adds. For maximum sensual impact, swivel your tongue along the crease and then blow on the area. This puff of air will cause the moisture to evaporate, producing a thrilling hot-then-cold sensation. Plus, he'll be able to actually feel you breathing, which will tune his body in to yours and give your intimacy a surcharge.


Nora's smart BUT she wants to be popular. So when she moved schools, her plan: never admit to anyone that she's actually smart, dumb down her subjects from AP classes to regular ones, join the cheer squad, and date the hottest, most popular, and possibly one of the dumbest guy in school, Jake. But when Adam enters the equation, her plans changed OR has to change.
If you have a feeling something might be taken the wrong way, stop yourself. Laurel House, the author of Screwing the Rules: The No-Games Guide to Love, suggests you take another look at your text before you send it and read it out loud to yourself. When it comes to sticking with safe subject matter, a good rule of thumb is if you wouldn’t talk to them about something in person, you shouldn’t talk about it over text. Lastly, keep your selfies and other pictures to yourself unless it has been okayed by them. Never send unsolicited anything.
Hey Eric! I just wanted to say I have followed a lot of your advice on your posts, & so far it’s been working much better for me than before I knew ANY of this stuff about men. Following your advice I got a really cute guy (who I’ve crushed on for 2 years) go out of his way to ask for my number. Thank you for sharing your knowledge to us & keep it up!
So, I've been talking to this guy for a couple of weeks. we have known eachother for awhile though but never talked to each other till recently. He was dating this girl for 2 years and they broke up 6 months ago , he messgaed me on instagram asking if i wanted to hangout sometime so i gave him my number! well we started texting for awhile but he isn't very consistent with texting and when we finally hung out i brought up how i always tect him for and he leaves me on read but then reply's to what i said couple days later. his reason was with school and work he has to work off his phone and my messages get pushed back and he would forget to reply, when he realized he forgot he had said it was too late to respond so i wouldnt bother. the next week he didnt talk much saying he had been, which i new he would be with what he had going on and moving out of his apartment that week. well he was active on snapchat at some concert so i thought i text him again and he never replied but still active on social media. i don't know if i shouldn't worry about it and text him again or just forget about it, maybe he isn't interested. i need help everyone i ask doesn't carer they just tell me i don't know. and i really need help figuring out what should i do.
When I was first trying to learn Japanese, texting was a god sent. I could spend 30 seconds or 10 minutes on a text and no one would be the wiser. More often than not I was spending the ten minutes. Most of which was used trying to figure out what the hell someone just sent me! Feeling a bit like I was working with a Captain Crunch decoder ring rather than a dictionary I slowly unraveled my text messages. ONLY TO REVEAL! Something very similar to a cereal box message, “mike san, are you happy today?” Of course I would be the creative foreigner and try to use characters I didn’t know. “yes, I am dance at the store yesterday.” This was usually when the other person would respond in English and I would feel a bit silly.
Brian, any woman worth your time, or any man that is rich’s time would have to be a very understanding woman, but you see the thing is, is if she enters into a relationship with you, that as long as you were up front with a her from the get go about how much time you will or will not have to be able to devote solely to her in your relationship, then she should not have any reason to complain about it. I’m quite positive that if your in what you believe to be a loving relationship, then she should be able to read you enough to know that you probably already wish you had more time to be with her, that it bothers and hurts you just as much. Just because your a man with money, it doesn’t mean you don’t have feelings, if she keeps badgering you about it, then it would be obvious that not only did she not pay attention to you from day 1 of your relationship when you told her clearly that this is how it was going to be, but also that she must not only not care, but not know you as well as you do for her or else she would be able to tell that your hurting too. Any woman worth your time and Love would know these this things. I know that I would.
I went on a trip with a guy. I know he’s busy from witnessing first hand the demand of his job. After the trip I texted him hi one day and he responded headed to dinner with a client I hope all is well. The next week I tested him with I know you’re stressed and pressured feel better. He responded the next day early in the morning with traveling sorry my text isn’t working great outside the us. I hope all is well.
I waited until I’ve read everyone’s comments and points of view and I both agree and disagree with the two. On the one hand here’s a woman whose fully equipped to take of herself. So why spoil and or give her the privileged life when she’s only here for some seasons and a reason. I completely understand due to the fact I experienced it personally. I took care of two guys in my life who used me and left me broke, homeless, and with a background to boot. Then comes to find out they get married to someone who provides stability since I wouldn’t. However, me being a woman myself, what woman don’t dream of being a princess out of some fairytale except those women who’ve accumulated their own, and vice versa.
If you think kisses on the hand are only for men courting women in the 1940s, then you haven't tried this one: Place the tip of your tongue on the webbed area at the base of his fingers, then slowly slide your way up the side. This move will give him goose bumps because this area is very sensitive — but, like the nerves of his inner ear, it rarely gets much attention, says Olivia St. Claire, author of 302 Advanced Techniques for Driving a Man Wild in Bed. Then, to make him completely crazy, take the tip of his finger between your lips. "It's suggestive of what I could be doing down below," says Fran, 39. (Hello, foreplay!)
Considering that you’re already considering going to extreme lengths to manipulate your partner to prevent him from ever leaving you, why not just kidnap him outright? Holding him hostage in a perilous and unnerving scenario may well induce Stockholm syndrome, strengthening any existing bond between you via the mechanism of mortal peril and domination. Your grandchildren will love to hear this romantic tale.
well i like this guy but some days hes saying stuff like i love you and being nice and playful and those days where he is just quiet. his friend who is a girl helps me to find more about him and he only has ever had 1 girlfriend and he hasn't dated anyone since they broke up which was last year. The girl who is talking to him for me (btw she is only mentioning me in conversations to see what he says she is not asking him out for me..thats weak.) she said that one of her other friends had a crush on him and he said he isn't into her and is not wanting to be in a relationship and this was a while ago not far. But its so hard to tell because she also said that when this guy talks to girls, but not like that she says that to the girl it feels like he likes her to but hes only being friendly. i'm losing hope and i have no idea if we can ever be a thing. i think he is only being friendly but thinking back of all the things he said to me i think he is kind of interested i guess.
This implies that if they went through a hard time financially, she’d be able to leave him with no guilt or remorse, but even if her beauty faded significantly after a given age, or any particular trait of hers that he loved her for decreased, he’d have no legitimate reason to leave, since those things could be considered “superficial” reasons to love someone, and that would work both ways.
I met this guy who play in the band. I thought that he was very handsome. We started talking and he asked me for my number. We started to text for a few weeks, all of the sudden he slow down on texting me and he never even ask me out or anything. He seem like he is trying to make me ask him out. Last I texted him he never reply till now. Should I be worried about or should I even ask him why he not really answering to my text anything. That was going to be my text to him “you seem to be very busy and I don’t want to be a bother to you. Let me know if you still want to talk to me”. What should I do?
"Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match / Find me a find, catch me a catch." We've come a long way from the era depicted in the classic musical Fiddler on the Roof, when parents routinely hired someone to find their adult children a "perfect match." We've now got the freedom to be our own matchmakers, but there's still a catch. It's not always an easy task! Consequently, many singles are enlisting the help of professional cupids whose business is bringing together compatible couples.

I say several times in the article that this stuff could apply just as easily to a man as a woman. So, that’s kind of the opposite of a sexist… I mean, yeah, I’m going to address an audience of women because this is a women’s site, but I repeatedly, explicitly write that I’m talking about behaviors that men and women mistakenly do and it has the same damaging effect regardless of gender.
With all the ongoing chaos around, I would just feel happy that someone texted me. There are equally important things in everyone's life compared to dating and every one of those things need some dedicated time to keep life balanced. I just respect the person for taking the initiation & value her time. I know that their time is as valuable as mine.
Meet new guys. Before you get a boyfriend, you’ll have to meet some guys. Don't worry, it isn't as scary as you think. You can try to get into a relationship with a guy you already know if they are decent, or you can go out and meet some new guys. Make sure he's got a great personality, smart and things that you would like to look for in a guy. This is easy and fun to do, so don’t be nervous! Make sure when you're meeting new guys you don't come across fake.
Let the guy you like know that you like him a lot, but never let him know that you’ve fallen head over heels for him. Always make him wonder about how serious you are, and let him be the first one to make the move into a serious relationship. The longer the chase, the more he would want you. But at the same time, push him away too often, and he’ll give up on the chase. Play hard to get, and yet, warm up to him often.
Advice, never compromise with guys, you only give them control over your life, YOUR life, and they will guilt you and manipulate you and tell you you are a bad person but in my honest opinion and literally the best thing I’ve ever done was to “brutally” put my foot down. It took two weeks because he just wouldn’t give up, crying and saying he was going to kill himself (because I told him a. I don’t care to hear about his “superior” arguments against feminists or black people r anything at all and then b. when I ignored him or get this, DIDN’T SEEM HAPPY when he ignored my request started crying, telling me I became an awful person and how I make him want to kill himself.)
my crush and I got to school together and we've dated off and on for the last 2 years and I dot know how he feels , like we'll hold hands but he always gives mixed signals , he knows how I feel but he also has multiple other people chasing him (more than half of them my backstabbing friends) and I don't want to betray my friends but they knew how I felt as well , I just don't know what to do
Flirting through texts doesn’t have to be some big puzzle. The best way to keep a conversation going is by actually having things to talk about. Ask him simple questions that will make him want to talk. Boys are just like us – they love talking about themselves. It gives you a chance to know him and breaks the ice by basically forcing him to text you back. Giving him open-ended questions keeps the convo flowing, and he’ll enjoy answering them.

Although this is classified as a "blaxploitation" film, it manages to be much more race-baiting than usual by having a white sniper (obviously modeled after Scorpio from "Dirty Harry" and thus indirectly modeled after the real-life Zodiac Killer)who disguises himself in black-face as he commits incendiary crimes against middle-class whites (which his why he is called "the zebra killer"--not because he kills any zebras). The good guy cop meanwhile is a black guy, thus giving the title its blaxploitation credentials. Still the plot was apparently pretty controversial which is no doubt why this film is pretty hard to find today even though it is probably cult director William "Grizzly" Girdler's best film.


The Real Reasons Men Don’t Text Back: The Ultimate “Do’s and Don’ts” Guide To Texting Exactly What To Do If He Hasn’t Texted You In Two Days Exactly How To Get Your Ex Back In 5 Steps Guaranteed 16 Giveaway Signs A Guy Likes You Through Texting He Hasn’t Texted Me in a Few Days? Why Do Guys Stop Texting? What To Do When A Guy Doesn’t Text Back
Sam-you hit the nail on the head again. After divorce at 35, took 7 years to find wife no 2. It’s virtually impossible to find a woman who fits requirements. Virtually all wanted kids and for me to look after them or had kids and wanted me to look after them. Finally found producer partner, not parasite partner. Im now the weak link on mortgage application. This eliminates the opportunistic behavior from women married to rich men and gives both people in the marriage complete freedom. If we got divorced, neither of our lifestyles would change. She doesnt need a penny from me and I dont need a penny from her.
Seriously? The odds of that happening are about as unlikely as me ending up sitting between three crying babies on my redeye home to Philadelphia for Thanksgiving. (Logically it should almost never happen but believe me, it can). This logistic is why I struggle with the iconic rom-com Serendipity. Sara had it made. She was in the same department of the same Bloomingdale’s at the same time as Jonathan. But, no! She had to throw it away just to prove a point. And she still gets him in the end? Smh. Luckily, in 2017, we have dating apps to control exactly what Sara was too optimistic to appreciate. We can plan to meet at a specific place. Then we can hope we’re not getting cat-fished. Which brings me to:
My guy went from texting every day to going MIA for a couple of days after I told him how I felt about him. I realized in reading this article that when I told him I liked him, it was for him and not for me…so while I would have liked a reply I didn’t need it to feel secure about his feelings. Ok, maybe I was a tiny bit worried about whether he would reply because he could have gone into the freak out phase. You were right, the sexy text did the trick. It took 3 minutes for him to get back to me after 2 days of radio silence. It felt good to give him something nice to look at during his long work day :)
#29. MAINTAIN his interest – Marriage is a LONG-term relationship, which means that you will consciously have to make efforts to keep his interest. You won’t be able to keep his interest if he knows EVERYTHING about you, and nothing changes. This is why it’s important to learn new things, new skills, and to create a life outside the relationship so that you have things to keep and spark his interest.

Find A Boyfriend


You may think falling in love is something that just happens, but the truth is, there's actually a science behind love. No longer do you have to worry if your love interest has the same feelings as you do, because you will now be equipped with all the hidden secrets that make a guy fall deeply in love. Of course, we can't guarantee that these tips will 100% work on your particular guy, but they will definitely increase the chances of him falling head over heels. If you're sure he's The One, and you want him to feel the same way about you, keep reading to discover the hidden, psychological tactics that will make him fall in love with you!

Relationships need a lot of effort, but sometimes it’s not easy to figure out where you should be directing that effort. Want to be more successful in dating? Then you’ll want to follow these simple steps for how to make a man fall in love with you, because believe it or not, there is actually a formula. It might not be magic, but it’s as close to a magic as you can get — and it’s also far more reliable.
It is not so much that the procurement of a wealthy partner is a problem as such I have found. The problem as an educated, above average, fit, woman of means myself is that when once I was able to procure a partner with means he proved to be unworthy and incompatible in other ways. By that I mean he struggled badly with the demons of alcoholism which was just terribly heartbreaking for me as a potential spouse. Moreover, as his fiancée, due to his sheer addiction (some would coin this textbook late stage alcoholism due to denial) it became an absolute deal breaker. /injects>
I know a woman who went out with a man she met on OKCupid. The chemistry wasn’t there, so they decided to be friends. He invited her to a party he was hosting, and she brought her friends. Now they’re all friends, and the ladies often ask the gentleman for advice on reading men. That’s a bonus in my book, to have a male friend who can give you a different perspective on dating than your girlfriends!

Another trick to make someone like you over text is to stroke their ego. Let them know they’ve made a positive impact on you and that they’re still on your mind. An example of this would be: “I just saw the cutest little squirrel in the park gathering nuts and it made me think of you!” A text like this is going to make the other person feel special — and making someone feel good is a surefire way to get them to like you.
* When am I going to lose it all? Rich men pay attention to fortunes lost all the time. An example is Eike Batista who is estimated to have lost $33 billion dollars in 16 months as his conglomerate, OGX Petroleo & Gas Participacoes SA lost 90% of its value. Batista is still worth $200 million dollars, but still, that is a frightening fall. Given the paranoia of losing it all, rich men are very methodical in their money management ways. They will allocate at least 20% of their net worth to risk free investments so that if things go to hell, they’ll still live a comfortable life. Rich men realize their wealth is an important reason why they have more selection.
#11 If you want to text him, do it. Now, if he’s not replying and you text him, stop. But if you haven’t spoken to him in a day or two, why not send him a text? You don’t need to wait for him to send you the first message. Let him know you’re interested in sending him the first text. This way, he either makes a move or not. [Read: How guys text when they like you – 15 things they do differently]

I’ve been going out with a guy for about three months now. He always tells me he really likes me, he’s very jealous and buys me flowers everytime he sees me. However, he has a tendency to “disappear”. By this I mean he will switch off his phone and go a whole day without talking to me and then say he was a bit busy. Recently he’s started to ignore my messages too .. What does this mean ?? What should I do ??
Help him feel special. One way to charm a guy is by treating him in a manner that makes him feel like he's special to you. When you're talking to him in a group of his pals, pay special attention to him. Make steady eye contact and ask him specific questions. Go out of your way to speak to him when you can and show a strong interest in his life, from his hobbies and his career to his family and friendships.

How To Make Any Man Want You


Oh my Goodness! I just saw my comment from three years ago! I was reading the post on how to start a blog and stumbled on this post. Congratulations on your growth Mr Financial Samurai! I have gone on to date two rich men since my previous comment and I can say that all the points you made are true! What you failed to mention though is the complacency that being on such a relationship can sometimes bring especially if you are very young and neither established nor certain of what career path you want to take. I’m glad that I’ve been able to keep myself motivated and save obsessively otherwise I would have lost 3 years. I’m still in a relationship with 1 of them but I have decided to sponsor myself in graduate school in the USA even though my boyfriend always dismissed the idea due to distance. Like you said, he has the means to fly down whenever he wants! I’m Nigerian BTW and our men have the ‘Provider’s mentality’.
I remember a couple that came to see me in distress because they had recently learned their teenage daughter had been assaulted by a boyfriend. A major conflict arose because John was threatening to kill the boyfriend, upsetting his wife and daughter tremendously. They worried he might actually seek revenge and end up in jail. With some work, I was able to help John express his true feelings: He cried, stating that he felt responsible for what had happened—as though he should've been able to protect his daughter. He felt terribly sad that his daughter was going through such pain, and he fell justifiably angry. After he expressed the full range of his feelings, he no longer threatened to kill the young man and was better able to support his daughter in helpful ways.
You can’t make someone be your boyfriend, silly! This isn’t Harry Potter! This is where you have to be strong enough to see when something isn’t working. If you’re five dates in and you feel completely comfortable with the guy, the sex has been amazing, and you’ve sussed out that you share the same values – politely inform him that you would like to make this official because you think he’s bloody amazing. He’ll probably (hopefully!) reciprocate.
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